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last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


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ONE. . . WHY
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CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
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last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
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movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
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global news matrix
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h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
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nobody here




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the guide
purple
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odd todd
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the superficial
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church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
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fark
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post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
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the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
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real doll (p)
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PROMPTS
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PO BOX 780398
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send me some music
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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-12-22 - 3:19 a.m.

slice of me (part 1)


what I give you today is a slice of life, heavy on the not-much-happening side... for me, it is mundane, everyday, boring even... I mean, secret code conversations like the previous entry are much more fascinating, aren't they?... and intimate revelations like the personal ad you could peak at in the entry before that... or so many other entries that each have more or less worth and validity and purpose and meaning than this one (everything being relative and all)...

but be that as it may be or not to be, you have the option of caring enough to read anything you wish and if this is more your speed, real life and all the babbling it inspires, then you may fall in love with this entry... or not... either way, it's another taste of the RealTime blog that I am so desperately trying to convince you to visit and comment in daily (oh, am I?... sheesh, now why'd I go and get so blatantly honest about it?... maybe cuz I'm kidding?... yeah, that's it, I must be kidding... I mean, I'm not that lonely and separate for attention and affection and love in the real world in RealTime, right?...

phew, that was close...

meanwhile (diving right in without even block-quoting), Rasputin gives Precious $20 for Chipolte and drinks for him and her and I give Precious $20 for Chipolte and drinks for me and she is surprised I expected change back... last time I was at Chipolte it wasn't much more than $7 and two 32 ounce Code Reds cost less than $4, so what am I missing?... ah yes, the spoiled factor... dontcha just love her?... and there I was all set to suggest she keep the change and bring me home Jeremiah's later... she beat me to my generous offer... heck, there should have been change for their two meals from Rasputin's $20 even... what can we do, the appreciation is lean, but I find it challenging sometimes to giggle when she gives me attitude for asking what?... no change? (seems to me it is reasonable from $40 when three eat Chipolte) and, at least for a semi-second, it sets my foot toward my brake pedal in the giving-mobile...

no wonder I've been used and taken to the cleaners all through this life, aye?...

of course I might just be a bit off color with myself because if I lived alone I'd have more money and have not eaten Chipolte tonight, but rather have eaten veggie burgers (repeat night after night substituting other fast foods and restaurant foods for less expensive healthier foods and guess who would be at a more comfortable weight and more energetic and maybe even develop a social life and romance and live happily ever after and win the lottery and find a time machine and space ship and travel to a planet where people don't kill each other and themselves all the time and... hello, are you still here?)...

I really should not be laughing...

I thought I wasn't?... damn, the giggles really should be more challenging, really they should... but I now continue this here, behind the candoor, because it is time to babble and babble we must (hey, some people have to dig, ya know?... old Con Ed joke, in case you missed it... and I bet few outside of old New Yorkers would find that reference ringing any bells) so continues now (more fanfare, more) at the one and only place where life in black and white pours out like some great magnetic metaphor for pouring out does, behind the candoor (or btc for those in the know)... I'll promised to link the entry there (in RealTime) when this is finally uploaded here (but now I have to find it, huh?... dang, more time consumption not babbling... ok, I'll look later) and until then, I actually attempted to cruise along back to the brevity and offline report that this RealTime blog is supposed to be, ok?...

yeah, just look at how that worked out...

before I do (attempt brevity), though (like you didn't see that coming?), it might be more informative and better perspective to know that the btc entry will be called spoiledness too (hey, there's a clue, aye?... I am so wise sometimes) and further expound on the profound depths and wonders (or at least true confessions and bare bones naked truths) within the word... and now that you're all excited to see the bare bones nakedness, I'll get right on finding time to write that entry and upload it and put the link right here (and how long did that take?)...

did you know that I hardly added anything to this entry so far?... yeah, that is why I am rolling my eyes at the whole idea of being brief over in RealTime... when I do not come to babble for a day or two (or several weeks or more as was the case in the past two months), the babble just has to come out and it takes over the supposedly brief RealTime blog and I sit here laughing at myself and my futile attempts at creating a blog that might actually get read because it doesn't drone on and on like we do here...

yeah, so anyway, there I was relaxing at home tonight and unfortunately I did not continue the healthy eating I was doing for a few days so I feel a bit bloated again (up and down, my bipolar appetites and will power could really drive me crazy if I wasn't there already... or heart attack, even)... Mila Kunis is inspiring some romantic memories to surface (she so reminds me of my own first love that imprinted a visual and emotional stamp on my libido and heart)... I think it's time to listen to some Meg and Dia and some fantasy or reminiscing or both...

at that moment in time
I thought I was in love
I felt like the happiest boy
living what I always dreamed of

I found precious happiness
I was living my rhyme
I was never looking less
at that moment in time

it was the happiest times I had ever known
surrounded by friends, never feeling alone
I couldn't imagine feeling more loved or at home
what could possibly make such a satisfied heart roam

I walked into the room and there she was
everything changed in my heart and mind
I went on with my life with the best of intentions
but I could not get her out of my head
no matter what I thought or felt or said
whether I was at school, at work, in bed
to her was where all roads lead
I could not get her out of my head

at that moment in time
I knew I was in love
I felt like a miracle child
so much at peace and still so wild

I did not love anyone any less
but I knew I found something sublime
I maxed out my happiness
at that moment in time

I knew I was ready to give up anything
risking all my friends and feeling like a king
I couldn't imagine a more challenging decision
but I knew I had no choice like a cataclysm

I let go of everything I knew before
everything at risk in my heart and mind
I approached her with the best of intentions
told her I could not get her out of my head
no matter what I thought or felt or said
whether I was at school, at work, in bed
to her was where all roads lead
I could not get her out of my head

and at that moment in time
time seemed to stand still
I was standing on a precipice
I was giving up free will

whatever she said was truth
her decision was mine
and all I could do was hold my breath
at that moment in time

now I could tell you about romance
or the secrets of happiness
I could tell you about the ultimate chance
or the thin line between being cursed or blessed
I could tell you life is a dance
the choice is mine I guess
I could tell you she said no
or maybe she said yes

but I'll tell you that it did not matter
at that moment in time
for wanting to give up everything
is the point of this rhyme

and it's the fall that matters most
once you touch the sublime
and I am still that much in love
at this moment in time


hey, what can I say, maybe that's the answer... or maybe there's an answer you'd rather see in the next entry...






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




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the moment

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