LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

Candoor: Blogmad? It's better than ever! Get more visitors (or find me in chat there). Register now and tell me for extra credits. VARB?


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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-12-17 - 4:11 a.m.

you said you wanted to know


what?... you say you miss my freestyle babbling?... you say you wanna know more about me, the writer, and the life in black and white behind the candoor?... well I'll tell ya what I'm gonna do... I'm gonna give you what you want... even if it's just one of ya...

so I nod off right after stuffing myself with pizza and chicken strips and rice and shrimp and salad for dinner and wake a bit later so ready for bed I can taste it (bed, not the food, but the food was good too, though I try to remember to always brush and floss and poke my gums and all that before bed cuz I don't want to feel the bacteria that causes gingivitis and tooth decay and all that stinky corrosive mouth stuff, but I don't mention it too often cuz it's kinda gross to think about what can happen in a mouth if one skips the after meal and daily hygiene that keeps gums healthy and teeth pearly white and intact in the mouth), but I remember there's laundry in the dryer and shirts that will be wrinkled if I leave them in there overnight so I check them and as usual the dryer needs a bit more time cuz I use the cooler mode so it doesn't shrink or damage the shirts and so I sit down to watch a bit of the game which is on the TV (which is on, along with all the lights, even though nobody is awake or watching or even in the room) and I toss in another load of laundry because I have not had time to do laundry in a while because I've had concerts and shows to enjoy every weekend and during the week for more than a few weeks now and sure enough I nod off again after munching on a few more chicken strips (that I surely didn't need but sleep-eating is an old habit) and I wake to curse the laundry for stopping again and wrinkling more shirts but I stay awake to hang up the clothes while putting the other load in the dryer and I decide to head over to RealTime to keep in touch the few friends who keep in touch with me in RealTime and after accepting the blogger-google site was down or something cuz I couldn't get to any of the pages I try to check in on there I just rambled a bit and that's when Precious came out to talk about her Spanish assignment with great zeal as she's excited about the subject and after bringing her down a bit cuz she's neglecting school and I wanted her to know I cared enough to be concerned, I cheered her enthusiasm and encouraged her to put some more time into academics even though she's skating through the elite IB program and then she went to bed and I zoned into space until the dryer stopped and I hung up more clothes, but a few shirts were not dry so I reached for chocolate which was about the dumbest move I could have made after the stuffing I gave my stomach earlier but dumb-R-me sometimes when I get in this habit of sedentary laziness and eating out of loneliness and that's when I came here to write this while waiting for the dryer to finish drying the last few shirts but now that I have the chocolate sugar rush I am bleary-eyed over-tired and buzzing about the space at the same time which will make for restless sleep and more sedentary laziness and blahs physical tomorrow so let this be a lesson to you, or something like that...

and then I checked my email, or to be more accurate, I downloaded my SPAM for the first time in several weeks and as usual I lost interest in trying to sort through the junk mail (and that is one reason I hardly ever email) and I pondered activating yet another email address (like fifty others isn't enough?) and trying some new technique to prevent it from being SPAMed and actually being able to find real messages from real people like you (and how many get lost?) in the tens of thousands of messages that flood my email boxes every week... and I felt sad about all the email groups I used to moderate (and groups I created) cuz I don't even know what's going on in them these days and any chances for connections are slipping by as the group mail is lost in the SPAM too... the great hope for the internet to bring more meaningful connections into my offline life is fading as the years pas and the only thing that becomes more certain is that junk mail increases and swallows everything else...

but then, I am too tired and over-stuffed and lethargic from lack of exercise to find the positivity in the air at the moment so I'll just ramble on wallowing in the blahs of soup-thick synapse motion as my brain is asleep as the fingers continue tapping keys and somehow my bobble-head has not fallen off my shoulders... and now that all the clothes are hung up and the laundry pauses (yes, there's still more to be done later in the week), I am sitting here watching Futurama because I like cartoons and science fiction because anything can happen in cartoons and the universe intrigues me, especially when I look around at the current state of humanity and the tiny mindsets and narrow perspectives that rule the fear-dominated species I am reluctantly part of at the moment...

I obviously did not mosh enough this weekend... and go figure, three concerts and two shows in five days and still, not enough exercise or energy infused... and now I recall (only to deliberately forget in the next moment) that this is why I let myself drift into lethargy... it is all too depressingly lonely and dead in this world and I'd rather not always be so acutely aware of it...

you never know when secrets might spill out...

and I was supposed to be dead asleep hours ago and now I'm sugar buzzing beyond any reasonable sensible logical physical ... wait... the TV just went off... there it was in the middle of some Star Trek spoof episode of Futurama when it just when blink and black... and after a few moments, the cable box had LORd flashing on it...

omigosh, it's a visitation...

after a bit of a chuckle I realized the cable box was actually reading LOAd, as in loading new software, but those dang LED readouts are a little holy, no doubt...

and just when you thought I was the only one spacing out and way beyond reasonably coherent, the universe, via the local cable company, sense a message that we are all bozos on this bus (and everything you know is wrong)... anyone pulling that reference out of their hat is either really old or has a wonderful education in comedy recordings... be careful or you'll have me saying things like you are so sophisticated, so worldly, so knowledgeable about life and aesthetics, you must watch adult swim...

stop right there
before you go any further
how many references did you miss
let me count the ways

the time we spend here
is equal to the time you're gone
but the weight the boy carries
goes on and on and on and on and on


so nothing is happening, but it's all good... I enjoy good days at work where I got lots done and made people happy and hardly nobody has a negative word to say... that is the best part of this new position, the lack of negativity in the air in the immediate space in and around my office... so different compared to the previous workspace... like day and night...

everybody groan...

if you remember my rambles (and rants) about working night shift, you may recall the whiny crap that used to be inspired by the laziness unprofessionalism selfishness and negativity that maybe drove most of the night shift people to choose to work the night shift (though some had no choice because they could not handle working a real job where they had to actually do some work and produce)... it's still there (and the ineptness of administration still can't seem to figure out how to get the night shift to do the simplest of tasks like file papers properly or make copies), but I'm not immersed in it and so can ignore it even as it effects the process during the day...

now I head in comfortably, pick up my mail, open my office, turn on my computer, and take care of business with nobody complaining or interfering or undermining... of course that is because I am setting up my own little world that is only minimally dependent on anyone else in the place and nobody understands exactly what I do or how I do it so no one can question what I am doing or how I am doing it as long as the job gets done... the head cheese walks by my office and smiles, as does my supervisor (the assistant head cheese) and all the other head cheeses follow suit... how sweet is that?...

ok, so the place would run better if more people had a clue about systems and analysis and organization and cooperation, but I can't change the world so I can enjoy the autonomy and freedom that having knowledge and skills that no one else has affords me... and the separation from the confusion and neediness and self-destructive habits that dominate the human race is so much easier too... oh my, what a few days off might do...


I'm not sure if life is much more fun when I get a little sleep, but I am more aware of how much fun it is when I am more awake...

and in case you didn't notice the first pebbles, I found a little time to start the babbling ball rolling you know where and by next week the landslide will pour scores of new entries into the madness behind the candoor...

it's so much fun to empty my head J







. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

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.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

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AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
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A Diaryland Survey
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small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
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gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




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TSUNAMI INFO
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brilliant idea
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FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
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