yeah, it has been a while... in terms of time as we know it at this moment in time, moments are long, months are eternities, and yet, the human race is but a fraction of a blink of a universal eye... so why do we take ourselves and everything else do seriously?...

did you maybe expect me to give up on rhetorical questions?...

so maybe i am stopping by here because i am sleep-deprived and this is the home for such states, even if i rarely return in spite of being more sleep deprived than ever more often than ever of late... or maybe it is the winds of change (and missing the CDs and tapes even more than ever, cursed by the girl from Quebec in Toronto, all those years ago)...

am i taking things seriously?...

and maybe those winds of change are swirtling (and swirling too) more than they have in some years as i ponder a major change in workload and responsibility and ststus (and status too) at work that has been brewing for some weeks now and just tonight, a major change in living space... to live alone or to roll the dice with another roommate may be (read: is) the question for the next few weeks...

what?... real life in real time?... yes, it still exists and what it is doing here is only anyone's guess, a moment of crossover perhaps (love?)... or maybe even something oddly erotic seeks more exposure than before, what with Evie melting V (and me too) and rapping hard core dirt mouth tough (what?... eleven year old shit on my face?) on a repeat SNL in the same night that gives the illusion of real time an amusing reflection...

oh, how i long to love like that again...

what madness brings irony with folly to be sure as i find myself in complex contemplation once more even as we know eternity is illusion in this life, we reach out beyond infinity and hope to find a wife, but then, reflecting on the passage of time in this space, we may come to terms with what we have and accept what is not in a state of grace... it is no disgrace to finally give up on some dreams if that means you can catch other dreams you chase... but oh, how i long to love like that... again...

if i sleep two hours, perhaps i will enjoy the theme parks more, without as much heat fatigue and lower the odds of muscle cramps...

perhaps i will explain something more sometimes soon...

as the changes keep on changing...

and oh how i long to recall that tune...

shhhh, let's not give up the pretense of taking it all too seriously too quickly, we wouldn't want to be misunderstood by the humans, after all... remember our instructions, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain and do not take the parentheses seriously, at least not until we are out of oz... cuz we know a place where dreams are born... and another where they come true (yes it can happen to you... if you are young at heart, ya know)...

apologies for the seriousness of the moments just passed and more, for all the silence of the past, but then, you ought know that truth is but a glimmer in a young child's eye and if you do not understand my silence, you will not understand my words...

and, in the end...

i just wanted you to know i miss you, i am alright, and i hope you are well too... you know how to reach me, through letters or voice (the numbers are still the same, as is the addresses)... and i leave you one more time with all my love... and your choice...

cha :)

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)