LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


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FAT MAN WALKING
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last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
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deep web search engines
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movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
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hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2004-03-30 - 12:04 p.m.

sure thing


I've got to change my ways... ideally, a personal fitness trainer or at least some active, healthy, very fit friends in my life would be a blessing... the only people I know are sedentary and aging much faster than they have to... I'm still bouncing off walls with energy and the only way I get to use it is to go off by myself and do something energetic... but without such a blessing, I must walk away from the couch potato people in my world more often, even if that's everybody and I'm already lonely and will moan over feeling even lonelier... change my ways, sure thing...

so I think I've made another decision (the funny thing about decisions is that they can be made and then, never happen... no matter how sure we are of anything, we can not be sure what will happen tomorrow... so we shall see, time will tell, and so on)... I went back to the gym today... a full month away, longer than necessary (probably), but you may recall I did head down there a couple of weeks ago and it was closed for repairs and I ran that night, but that's it for the past month... so I think I need to change something...

I don't get nearly as much privacy to write and do anything else (like cook) around here anymore... I don't want to boot Precious out of the living room (even though she has a TV in her room) and she's starting to cook more often in the evening (when I wake to get ready for work), so I'm going to try a different schedule and see if it works better for me... I go with the flow too much... behaviorally I am in large part a chameleon... that is, if the TV is on and I'm living with couch potatos who eat poorly and too much, I will probably do the same just cuz it's easier and more social... it's a when in Rome kind of way to be...

so in order to have the kitchen to myself, I'll start cooking when I get home from work... I don't have to eat, but I can cook (the kitchen is tiny, one at a time is all it can handle)... but I don't have to eat then because that would be too close to my bedtime... I should probably take food to work and eat around 4AM... then I can head to the gym when I get home... then shower without having to share the water... then I'll write (ah, sweet privacy, music or silence and the words) and catch up here (so the entries will be more me and the stimulus I choose and less influenced by what is going on around me that others choose... and then I'll sleep in the afternoon and evening and then get up and eat something I prepared in the morning before before heading to work...

see, I have a habit of eating one meal a day and that is not best for the body... and though exercising when I wake up might be better than after work, compromise is the name of the game when you have two roommates... changing a schedule of daily behavior is not as easy as it seems and writing it all out here should help me (since I've adjusted it several times already while writing to make it fit better for me and for my roommies... today is the first day... with some strain in the chest and almost cramping in the feet, I survived another push at the gym... and it's about time I stopped being lazy and using the kidney stone as an excuse... yeah, that's telling me...

so... what's it all mean?... no more eating one huge meal a day... at least two, maybe three (I keep hearing many small meals is better than one or two large meals, but is there really time in a day to prepare a lot of small meals?... or maybe the trick is to prepare them all at once and just heat up stuff?... leftovers every meal?... stop looking at it as half full dummy... ok, so maybe more meal planning would be better for the body...

what, me plan?...

ok, meals that take less time to cook then... and reheatable stuff to take to work... I could pack up two microwaveable meals for work and skip the before work meal (saving time)... or if I wake early enough, I can make it three meals by eating before work too... but more than three meals?... where would I put all that food? (in an ever expanding stomach?... we shall play it by ear... and stomach)... increasing the daily exercise again is the change I am going to focus on most because I already have the habit of eating and getting to the gym daily again is the habit I want to bring back into my routine... yeah, that's the ticket...

and learn to say no to the fast food junkies and imbalanced diets and impulse eating and lethargic habits of those around me... yes, that is as important as anything...

ok, so there's my pep talk... well, sort of... it's not really a pep talk... actually, it's just me talking to me about me and it is good not to be excited about it... more seriousness means more chance of the change to actually happen... you remember, no matter how sure the decision...

there is no sure thing...

now we laugh...

no worries, it's a very serious laugh... and I've got a feeling that a few of you out there will be holding me to the words in this entry, not that I do anything for anyone else unless I want to (I am such a stubbornly independent child... and can be atrociously selfish when I want to be... that's the key, wanting to be... wanting to take care of me in the manner best for me again... even if it increases isolation at first)... focus on the positive, yeah, I seem to forget that more often than I used to...

I think you are being allowed to challenge me... influence me... lead?... hmmmm, that would be something new for me... in any case, I am not ignoring the influence so that is a good sign... and maybe I'll even visit the other community (what me?... let a whole community influence me?... wow, Amy Lee {Evanescence} must be singing now)... find somebody in this area, in the daily physical world who might be empowered to influence me?... somebody with more energy and in better shape?... really give up the life of the mostly dead?... now don't get too excited cuz you remember what happens when you get too excited...

yeah, sure thing...






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


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the moment

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