before we forget, if you love baseball, statistics, and managing a team of your own, check the Fantasy baseball link just over there on our left... it's fun and free and we can share our baseball genius and with friends (well, we'll all become friends, ok?)...

and now, on with the entry...

and so we sit here again in our own private worlds, separate, yet together, alone, yet sharing... the relativity of time and space could never be more evident than in the feeling we can share right now, whenever the now might be (and it is at least two different times)... ah, metaphysical equations leap frog through the synapses still firing in my head... just returning from 50 minutes on the LifeFitness 9100 machine (for details, check with the dead, who are really only mostly dead {and there are two major references that came together to draw the name of the character that represents the depressed aspects of my psyche, but that's a tangent of a different color and the horse it rode in on is your second clue}, and who {the mostly dead} are the current keepers of the stats and whatever contact with the physical body my mind still maintains, in case you wondered), after working nine and a half hours (no reference to weeks intended, though Libbo {yet another character representing yet another aspect of my psyche, though I've yet to provide Lib with diary space} looked up for a moment), my brain is a bit sugar deprived... I don't have sensible snacks in the house (actually, I have no snacks at all at the moment) so the twngs of hunger are confusing the synapses because I will probably be asleep in a few hours since I am due back at work in about 11 hours and would like to get at least six, if not seven or eight hours sleep at least the first week or so during this period of returning to working outand since I know it would be much easier to work out this body if twenty or thirty pounds were burned off, I should not eat too close to sleep time and don't have any activities planned for the next few hours other than relax with the computer and ramble on (and maybe read some email) until I nod off and roll into bed... on the other hand, or synapse, I think maybe I should provide the muscles with some fresh protein since they are being asked to wake up and rebuild themselves again for the bigazillienth time (and the machine told me I burned 923 calories in the fifty minutes I supposedly traveled 4.95 miles going nowhere... ah, more relativity of time and space)... and the semi-foggy misty state of mind provided by the hour of working out (I did some reps on a couple of the weight machines before the mostly aerobic machine)... brings me to that awareness of the relativity of, yes, time and space, that I have references several times in this paragraph and except for the assorted tangents, is what this paragraph was about... if we are still sharing the moment, that is...

most might have stopped reading somewhere after the horse...

but for those of you who admire, or at least care enough about me to put up with, rambling such as the kind I call babbling and some learned folk might call free association, I shall continue (even distracted by the brain asking for food... maybe I'll give it a little something and come back)...

I ran to the kitchen and rattled some pots and pans... well, not really... I walked to the kitchen and put some veggies and shrimp in a sweet and spicy sauce in the microwave... I had prepared the dish yesterday but the crowded kitchen at the precise hour I leave for work kept me from wanting to cook it last night... and I didn't really have time to enjoy it anyway... so it is going to be my snack now and one of my meals later... I had three small meals today and this will be the fourth... that is three more meals than I usually eat... but usually the one meal I usually eat is usually more food than the three meals I've already eaten today combined... most of my abdomen is stomach, I think... maybe that's why my kidneys rebel now and then, their petition to the universe (or at least the brain) for more space... anyway, we've got a few minutes for this explanation before the food is cooked (it's still odd to call anything heated in a microwave cooked, but then, it is boiled as the water molecules are excited to randomly crash into everything and produce great heat and boiling is cooked, even if it is boiling from the inside, so nevermind)...

the microwave stopped, but the food will cook another few minutes left in there, so we have another paragraph to share... and along comes Sally... sometimes Sally brings home food as a surprise, but he hasn't been doing that much lately... maybe he's trying to cut down on fast food or save money too (I sure could benefit from doing both, though I only eat fast food when eating with him)... Sally eats steak at almost every meal... a diet consists primarily of diet Pepsi, meat, potatos, eggs, cheese (please hold the veggies), and the occasional ice cream... except for the ice cream, definitely not my primary diet... I much prefer fish to meat or chicken and prefer pasta or rice to potatos (though I enjoy potatos more than cow or chicken)... I do love cheese... and I can (and do) make meals of primarily veggies cuz I love most veggies (no artichokes, too bitter)... we're like at opposite ends of the food spectrum, which is a shame, cuz it's more fun (not to mention more economical) to eat with a friend than to eat alone... Precious has the same tastes as her dad... so I must resist the influence for socializing at meal times and cook my own thing... alas, who will save this lonely almost vegetarian amongst massive meat eaters?...

me, naturally... that's life...

I think I'll go over to the food and nibble some now... the kitchen is empty... we shall see if my going into it draws Sally to want something at the same time...

actually, it was momentas after I sat down... and now, it is three hours later... so much for my grand intentions to babble and read mail and so on... time has slipped right passed into the past even as we sat here in ur different times sharing this now... uh-huh... what happened was... after eating Sally and I explored out fantasy baseball teams and time passed... wait a minute, I did not eat Sally... just in case you read that the wrong way... anyway, you were there, weren't you?... or were you here?... now you are here, though your now and my now are not the same in the context of this text... and yet, we are sharing this now, here, wherever I might be when your now of reading meets my now of writing...isn't time and space amazing?...

I ate, by the way, more of my veggie shrimp dinner than I thought I would... all of it, in fact... that means I have no dinner prepared for tonight... that means I have to hope I wake in time to cook something and prepare lunch to take with me... that means I have to hope my roommies do not have a dire need for the kitchen at 10PM... alas, no time for email or anything else... alas, the creative juices must be swallowed again... alas, and alack... and I still need to shower (yes, disgusting, aren't I?... come back from the gym and change without showering... the writing jones has no concern for personal hygiene... it's the madness, the genius, the art... or addiction and insanity... or just plain stinkiness...

that ought to attract potential lovers and soulmates by the drove, huh?... well, I am irreverent at best so you just have to put up with the pros and cons of a person who, at times, takes nothing seriously and then again, who, at other times, takes everything seriously... serious irreverence, remember?... what, you don't remember?...

there is more irreverence in my seriousness than most people would care to see and more seriousness in my irreverence than anyone has ever fully explored...

let that be a lesson to us all...

so I must get to bed soon so I can wake for work and still have the energy ten hours after waking to get back to the gym again... and yet, I am still hungry... I am always hungry... probably more loneiness than hunger at this point... physical loneliness... my mouth wants to do something and food is available where other mouth activities are not... I really don't want to suck an egg... a grape, however... ever peel a grape with your mouth?...

obviously it is bed time...

zzzzzzzzzz...

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)