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2004-06-06 - 4:26 a.m. return and finally, here we are... today, that is (remember?)... so this is the grand return to daily updating that we've long been waiting for... anyone who was around for the last umpteen hours or so might have witnessed (or even been a part of) the previous ten entries (hitherfore, or to, for this entry only, and quite probably one other known to be 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, followed by this entry that you are reading at the moment) that were put together from scraps of notes and odd ends of thoughts and influences from the immediate environment (sometimes called distractions) and some visual fantasies (TV is good for something) and the stuff inside my head (memories, philosophies, dreams, imaginings, whatever) and mostly written in the past previously mentioned umpteen hours as they were created and uploaded, but for most of you this might be a relatively meaningless (or at least confusing) paragraph and perhaps diary, for that matter... no worries, your life won't be altered too much if you're careful... on the other hand, this just might do it... and Goonies appears on the TV now... yes, for the love of innocence and treasures (and mini-skirts) everywhere), Cindi Lauper was just too much fun (not to mention Sean Astin and Kerri Green and Martha Plimpton and yes, even Mary Ellen Trainor being just too cute {goofy can be cute too} for their own good... anybody out there?)... dang if the kid in me has been asleep for a long long time (did I just hear Linda Ronstadt?... oh please somebody)... it could be all the cookies I've eaten this weekend... and did I mention Harry Potter enough lately?... yes, The Prisoner of Azkaban has invaded my consciousness (living with a Potter fanatic helps) as I once again find an orphan character I relate to (you'd think I'd outgrow relating to and falling in love with kids by now, but I guess it might take a few hundred years for me to start actually growing up... or longer... as Robert Heinlein proposed, there is Time Enough For Love ya know)... and Norah Jones sits beautifully at a piano and sings, so it must be Two Weeks Notice and as cute as Sandra Bullock is, I'd so much love for Norah to be sitting here sharing song and the getting to know all about you process... but closer to reality (sort of), the excitement is finally sitting down and getting more into Neil Gaiman via Neverwhere... we really must become more aquainted, literarily, at least... I went food shopping (you might have already heard about the evil cookies) and after spending close to $200 and filling the fridge and freezer and cupboards, I still somehow found my way to spending more money on dining out (though today was pick up and bring home Chinese because of the Fantasy baseball draft and I haven't forgotten that I promised I'd list all my teams one of these days for you few baseball fans out there)... that would be Rasputin's evil influence (see why I call him Rasputin?... the boy is pure evil... what?... the cookies?... well, I never said I wasn't evil)... but I did finally turn off the television, so there must be streak of goodness and maybe even some sort of wisdom somewhere inside... besides the TV being on all night as background noise and occasional superficial distraction or inspiration (if we are rather generous, perhaps), I've been copying CDs (yay!... my musical muses cheer)... now if I'll only put on my headphones and get back to listening instead of letting the TV be the background noise, some semblance of creativity might actually return... ah, with you or without you (though I still believe there are so many more wonderful possibilities with someone than alone), so much might come of a return... bless you all for hanging in there (here) with me through this long journey through solitude... I will not give up on hope or love I will not stop believing in trust I will continue to strive toward a positive perfection and peaceful resolution and fulfillment of an optimized life... and believing that love shall return to me is the simple faith that keeps me alive... even when I am gone... and so I shall, someday, as I did today, return (see?)... hope you do too...
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