recycled, the entry, for various apparent reasons and even more, not apparent or even thought of at the moment, except to follow up on the next entry which presents the comments that this entry inspired...

don't be too fascinated :)

i sit down to rest my leg and pick up the keyboard out of habit and it sits on my lap while the TV and roommates call for attention (i wonder if i'll find time to watch the new episodes of L'iL Bush, which mocks the obvious but is that enough to be consistently funny? {staring wide eyed as if something profound was being pondered might help)� personally, i much prefer understatements, for that matter� but then, you know that [don'tcha?]� or maybe not}� whatever, TV is the opiate of the masses� or is that insulting opiates?) and i really have nothing much to say, but i type on anyway�

please drink responsibly� try water�

so i was rolling along for five innings, still not walking anybody and until the fourth inning, actually had a 2-1 lead (the defense behind me fell apart after the in the fourth inning, but that's the longest they lasted� eventually the game ended in the sixth inning, 15-5� we finished the season with one win� this team is still better than my Sunday team though� much� sad, isn't it?)� the best i can do is not walk anybody and hope the defense catches the ball and throws runners out� and there we were in the sixth inning and a slow ground ball calls me out and i hobble over to it and reach down with my bare hand because there's no way i'd throw the guy out if i went for the ball with my glove and i grabbed the ball and tossed the runner out and sure enough, set the hamstring back a week again� so i sit here as if the two weeks since the original injury barely happened and look forward to six more weeks of winter, or rather, six more weeks of no running� hopefully i did not extend that time before i can start running again� so owie and boo and oh well, i limp along happier to be out there playing than i would be sitting home alone healing�

we could use cheerleaders... or at least a cheerleader... after all, we want to save the world... ok, i can use a cheerleader... and not just to save the world, but that's another story...

i started eating salads again the past two days� unfortunately, after the game tonight i stopped for a great big plate of fried shrimp, scallops, whole clams, fries, onion ring, beans, and 60 ounces of water� there goes any weight i lost in the past few days� maybe i should just give up on the dieting and accept being thirty or forty pounds over my ideal weight until i can start running again� but then there's the blood pressure thing to consider� i don't like medicines� there's always the aciphex commercial on TV to laugh at when i want a distraction� seriously, have you listened to that one?... just close your eyes and listen� aciphex� the drug had to have been named by a former writer of Saturday Night Live�

every day, or night, for how many years now?... i refer to my returning to the web and babbling on and on about this that and the other thing and whatever comes to mind, all the while secretly slipping in subliminal messages to the one and the universe (which some call the multiverse, but is mostly likely the infiniverse, and who you might call god or God, but that's beside the point) it is supposed to be about 38 degrees Fahrenheit tonight� just like last night� the difference is that tonight, i turned on the heat� something bit me on the inside of the right elbow� it suddenly itches like crazy and now that i scratched it, is bumping up as bites will do once they are scratched� i am wearing long sleeves, so i wonder if the bug got under the sleeve� or maybe it's some sort of allergic reaction� or the infiniverse laughing at me cuz i am so easily distracted when i want to be (which would be me laughing right back, or along with, or something along those lines)�

pollard at ld (or is that id?) 2000 dot com (YSS) just texted me and said "seen ur pf your kinda cute wanta ch@t (Aurora dot everydayintheend dot com) and i have no idea who that might be and 36245 is the called id, so i suppose it is a spam text message... i typed in id2000.com and ld2000.com and the everythingintheend.com address and got the error message that the address doesn't exist or something like that� rejected, even by spam� or spim, to be precise� of course it could be that i am officially old, like in i no longer "get it", i am just not "with it", I lost my "dope", my "phat", i am just not "tope". nor am i "crunk", i do not "grok" anymore, i am doing a bad imitation of Dr. Evil, so i guess i should just shake off the spim, kick back, and get to chillaxin)�

i don't like wearing clothes� i noticed that i am sitting here in a long sleeve shirt and long pants with underwear on underneath (such a conformist) and a t-shirt over the long sleeve shirt and this is the first time i have sat here with this much clothes on in a long long time� usually i just have boxer style shorts and a t-shirt on� and it only takes a day or two of weather that requires clothing to remind me why i moved south and stay here even though, as noted in a discussion at work today with a colleague who is moving back north soon, i am still not earning as much as i did in the mid-eighties� ridiculous, perhaps, but it's a trade off i accept because i do not like wearing clothes and i love tropical climates� you probably heard this before�

after many thousands of blog entries, i am bound to be repeating myself in an endless loop of self-expression, introspection, retrospection, contemplation, and general narcissism� and if anyone ever ventured back to the beginning of time (or at least the beginning of my time on the web, which would be the nineties and the earliest blogs on the personal sites linked on the right sidebar that i leave deliberately slightly obscure as i mention it here in some futile attempt to not feel the loneliness that compels me to return here nightly in the hope that the super secret subliminal messages subtly slipped into these massive missives again and again in the hope that the magic moment will return and everybody will live happily ever after might reach the one who understands it all and then, everything changes again and returns to it's perfectly pristine wonderfulness and beauty and love love love reigns brighter than the age of aquarius and shines through us all�

huh?...

ah, yes, perhaps� kapish?

if i ever finish a thought, or complete one, i'll be sure to ask you to be sure to let me know so i can be the first one to tell you that you'll be the first to know�

so why don't i sleep?... some sort of lingering longing, to be sure, but perhaps it is my own very effective way of joining the human race's obsession with slow suicide� i was much younger in the years i slept when i felt tired and did not interfere with this body's natural circadian rhythm� it has little to do with time, and everything to do with how time is used, or passed, or whatever we do with it� i really wouldn't mind some wild sex right about now, but that's only one thing i'd like to do with time� times has so much potential and is so versatile, after all� mostly it's wasted�

yeah, i'm still awake�

again�

how are you? :)

originally posted by candoor at 2:59 AM on Feb 29, 2008

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)