did I miss yet another

again?...

of course I did... I really need to get myself a calendar and pass it around to all of you so I can have more reasons to celebrate every day... hey Andrew... this is a great idea that would take little effort... create a birthdays link page where anyone who wants to can enter their birth date and have it listed on a big Dland calendar... it can be a diary with twelve pages, one for each month... eventually, if millions join in, it can be a diary with 366 pages, one for each day of the year... heck, we can even do two a day, AM and PM for each day if the pages get too big... imagine, if the whole world participated we can have a diary page for each minute of the year...

and one or a few more for each date for people like me who do not know their time of birth... there you go, Andy Baby, your next project to change the world by bringing it closer together on the internet... I'll help if there's a place for a babbling fool with stuttering fingers... can you feel the excitement?...

ok, on to other world shaking news...

I have decided, after careful random analysis of several bags of individual Halloween packages of Whoppers! malted milk balls, that at least ten percent and perhaps up to thirty percent of the malted milk balls in the individual Halloween packages were duds, or worse, were turds... yes, I think that those malted milk balls that are not crisp and fresh, the ones that are honeycombed and turned gooey-taffy as if some worm or faulty chemical process ate away the crisp sweetness and left this hallowed out unacceptable gummy-stuff shall be called turds...

how many turds do you get in your bag of malted milk balls?...

I believe that Brachs, which are larger and somewhat more expensive than the well known Whopper! brand, turn up less turds... I have, in my long life of great chocolate indulgence, lost patience with the merely good and seek the excellent, the superb, the outstanding, nay, the perfect chocolates... there are some truffles I purchased the day after Halloween that come close to that level of chocolatey goodness... Lindt makes them, Lindor Truffles... mmmm, melt in your mouth orgasms...

this information is of no use to the dead, of course, and if I continue to eat Halloween chocolates at the pace I've been eating Halloween chocolates for the past few weeks, I will certainly be dead before Xmas...

and then how will I be able to enjoy the Xmas chocolates, after all...

overall, for the record, I don't think I've indulged my food addictions quite so consistently over quite such a long time as I have in this year called 2005... the odd thing is how amazing the human body can be in adjusting to the human eating patterns... I've eaten more meat and fat and sugar and salt and so on in the past year than ever before and yet I have no body complaints, while two years ago, for a while I was considering needing to drink prune juice daily for the rest of my life... and my cholesterol has gone down in the past three years... of course there is that liver thing my doctor wants me to check out, but still, this year may go down in history as the year I did the worst damage to this body yet (lack of exercise, weight gain, and poor diet), which is insane considering I am no longer able to simply run off ten pounds in a marathon...

but one more marathon before I die would be nice...

and speaking of marathons (or of people who still run them) today I found beautiful... it's a performance piece... you know, art... then again, maybe you don't know... art, without the limits of cultural bias or mores, disgusts as many as it enthralls... well, start with Christina herself... as in Aguilera... she disgusts as many as she enthralls even before Jen Collins gets a hold of her (stop, it's not that kind of video... too bad, perhaps, but still let's not get distracted by imagining what might have been... let's imagine what is)...

so imagine: Christina Aguilera gets her first period

oh, did I spoil it for you?... no matter what you say, words can't bring Jen down... the surprise, for those of you who think you know, but do not click on links enough, is you can find Jen right here at Dland...

I am so wanting to be her favorite... but then, I'm secretly (or maybe not so secretly) a link whore... yes, I formally confess that I want the most linkers in the universe, or at least here at DLand... and at LiveJournal... and MySpace... and BlogSpot... and everywhere else too... oh, alright, the universe... and all the other universes too, for that matter... or energy... if every superstring would start to sing...

anyone who got the reference in the last line of that amazingly egocentric paragraph deserves a full performance of the entire production and can have just that if you come forward and reveal yourself to be as insane as me...

the marathon running excites me... I wonder if I will ever run one again... and as if synchronicity really happens (as if I don't believe it does) I stumble upon another DLand marathoner... maybe there's a Dland ring?...

yesterday (or once upon a time), this was just in:

New York, NY -- Auction history was made at Sotheby's when Pablo Picasso's Gar�on � la Pipe, from the fabled Whitney Collection, sold for $104,168,000 to an anonymous buyer, making it the most expensive painting in the world.

imagine, some colorful chemicals on canvas and it's worth more than some countries... see, that's what I mean about art, you just never know...

meanwhile, I want to meet zanti misfit cuz, well, cuz shes a misfit and, well, cuz she's big (you might need to belong to myspace to see that picture)... so I decided to take her quiz, or fill out her Friend Application, or whatever it is...

here it is now:

1. How did you find my profile?

I clicked... ummm, from here... I got there from, ummm, a comment you left here... I got there from, well, either this profile or quite possibly something pfirsich said, or perhaps this smell lead me to you through some olfactory passage of a supernatural convolution of a space-time warp or maybe even one of the places I've already linked above... in any case, I'm happy I did (find your profile) even if I don't exactly recall precisely how... or why, even...

2. What do you like most about my profile?

the words... I think they represent your sense of humor and if that is correct, then I really like your sense of humor... if I am wrong, well, then I really like the words whatever they might mean... and your big picture, I really like your big picture... I want a big picture too when I grow up...

3. Why do you want me to add you?

add me?... oh yes, I actually do have a myspace thing... it's candor there, the name of the myspace thing, that is... I don't use it either, in fact, I have much less of a profile than you have... perhaps I'll invest some time in fixing the place up one of these days... but add me?... sure, because I like the words and always liked misfits because I am as misfitty as they come and besides, always wanted a really big friend... I'm not much into being stomped though...

4. Do you know what Wawa is?

water in Hellen Keller talk?... an insurance agency?... something Nell said?... the last name of a character Gilda Radner used to play?... your mother-in-law?...

5. What do you think of that wallpaper?

sticky business, wallpaper... it's seldom esthetically pleasing to me to have any repetitive patterns surrounding me in any sort of space... this wallpaper would drive me to crankiness too...

6. Got milk?

no, my mammaries are male and therefore do not produce milk and besides, I sold the cow to a very nice family from Dover... now I have, on occasion, some white milky-looking liquid substance that is sold in containers in large stores full of food... the stores, that is, are full of food, and other things... the containers contain the white milky-looking substance... when combined with chocolate, it is an old friend from another time and place served by a grandmotherly type person, but I am still not quite sure if it is milk...

7. Can you hear me now?

no, but if you choose to call, I will most likely hear you... the number is on some corner of this page... on the other hand, I am feeling I hear you, as in, perhaps understand the subtle nuances of your character and wisdom and insight and lunacy... your hair is loud, I hear that... and I also hear you are big, very big...

8. Revolution now?

naturally, now and always... without change, we die without knowing we were ever alive... with change, we also die, but it's a lot more exciting along the way... the first thing I'd like to change is the fear-based philosophies that seem to dominate human thought and action today... I propose replacing fear with laughter in equal measure and force any violators to have public sex with themselves, or each other if that is funnier... either that, or they must sing show tunes in the nude while riding horseback without a saddle... perhaps, if they are amicable, they might have a sheet and even a pillow if they appear quite cooperative with the new world order... continued fear-based actions will be dealt with with fathers lightly brushing the fearful one's most tender spots, to be determined by a panel of judges so chosen for their ridiculous sense of humor as observed by their collection of Monty Python, Three Stooges, Marx Brothers, Robin Williams, and Ellen Degeneres recordings, at least... in any case, we must get them nude, that's the thrust of the matter...

9. How old do you think I am (don't look at my profile!)?

six and a half... you seem older than me, not just cuz you are big, but cuz you know a lot and you have a mother-in-law... I don't have family to references such relationships, but that's enough to age anyone, I am told...

10. How cold is it where you are?

I've forgotten what cold feels like... except when I drink semi-frozen water or other drinks and my mouth and esophegal (spelling?) passages laugh gleefully at the experience... otherwise, I am not a fan of constant cold... winter is a season to be visted brief, for a little skiing or building of snow people, but not a place to live... at least not for me... so it is quite warm here in Florida...

I think a real nothing is better than an artificial something, but that may have nothing to do with the link behind the words... you should go see for yourself so you can decide for yourself... unless your spiritual leadership has forbidden you from thinking for yourself, in which case, what the hell are you doing here?...

research, I suppose...

as for me, I come here for the chills, so try to come to the query without the conclusion already set in your mind, ok?... cuz art is art, after all, without pre-set expectations (or spending limits, for that matter)...

though it reminds me to get a pop-up blocker (and a more modern computer so I can use Firefox and hopefully not crash nearly as much as this MS crapware does), strange cosmos can be hours and hours of fun... especially if I was ever to start some sort of photo diary...

until then, just have a good laugh at gizoogle (see what this entry looks like or enter your own website for a chance to be personally gizoogled...

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)