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( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )
MEG AND DIA!
ORLANDO?
WHERE IT BEGAN
ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)
ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)
Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?
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CONVERSATION WITH GOD
MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN
(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)
o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o
ABOUT ZOOPLA
o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o
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o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o
HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
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NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL
(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)
HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
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THE FAILURE
FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)
The White House
(202) 456-1111
Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121
YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM
FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!
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SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA
OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)
mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics
fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here
SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN
3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg
REFERENCE LIBRARIES
questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library
deep web search engines
itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals
AMUSEMENTS
Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked
CULTURE
the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible
COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)
(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?) (a turn on or a laugh?) real doll (p) (the ultimate self-indulgence) (or it could just be a typo) |
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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications
2006-08-07 - 8:35 a.m.
bullocks!
I am beginning to have a strange affinity for that word, much as I have an even stranger affinity for Smash, who planted the word between my ears (little did he know it would grow and become part of the madness that pours out of my fingers most every day, aye?)... for in my way of thinking (which may very well be bullocks!), everything has a fairly equal potential to be bullocks! because anything is possible and in that sense, we can conclude that everything is bullocks!...
let us summarize, ipso facto fashion:
if:anything is possiblethen:everything is bullocks!
now, it might just as easily be presented that everything is not bullocks, considering that anything is possible... and to relieve you of the burden of reading through seven hundred lines that lead to the following point, you can breath a sigh of relief and take my word for it that we can ultimately conclude that everything is anything and bullocks! are bullocks!...
I rest my case...
I mean, what good is carrying around an empty case... logic dictates that no one is going to fill it when I am carrying it around, but the possibility does exist in stronger probabilities that if I rest my case, preferably outside of an established pub, then it might be filled with some rich stout or stout ale or anything that would make it worth my while to pick the dang case back up...
of course I'd probably not drink as much as Smash, being that he is a professional drinker and I am but a retired drinker, but for certain people under certain circumstances I might still find myself under the table by night's end... preferably with some sort of illegal substance in my hands, for what good is destroying a perfectly rehabilitated liver and breaking wind with friends without breaking a law or few...
but you jest, he says, wiping a creamy froth from his lips...
this entry (and the word it is about) might just as easily (with probably greater probability) be all about the previous entry as it is about the price of grapes in Greece... you do realize that grapes gain value after they are touched by the feet of virgins, right?... but that's besides the point... I was orating about the complexities of existence and proving that everything we know could be wrong, or even that we do not exist, or something like that...
of course my proof is based on faith, like everything else...
and you thought I was being serious, didn't you?... well I might have been... being serious, that is... I very well might have tossed, ever so nonchalantly into your visual cortex, words that suggested to you the secret meaning of life (not withstanding the universe and everything) and now, in my ever irreverent splendor, carefully construct the deconstruction of the clause, pausing only to allow you to become even more confused and then, before you can gather even a bushel of wits about you, dive into the compound fracture of your psyche and coerce you to contemplate your navel (or some holy trinity, whichever seems more applicable)...
clue: this entry may be aided by mind-altering substances...
and in the event of fire, blow hard in the direction away from the fire with the maximum use of your vocal chords and pursing of lips to express dire danger to anyone who might be coming near, then run like hell out of the inferno and tell everyone you meet that you just left a place that will be no more if the fire department doesn't get wise to the need for it's services post haste... then call your mother and tell her you love her, or at least tell her that someone loves her because everyone's mother should be loved by someone, especially in the event of fire...
and with this, we begin to conclude today's episode of As the Fart Pfffs with the singing of our national anthem, followed by tumultuous congregating around a burning bush awaiting a long bearded old man to bring us some answers to the questions that have haunted mankind (women always knew better) since the dawn of rocks... while waiting, we might glance skyward to see the writing left by Godot as he wandered past while we were not looking, laughing as the gas ignited to form the trail that said, blow it out of both ends and in fine print just below, except in the event of fire and one can't help but wonder if he is laughing because the truly helpful (and life-saving) advice was in the fine print...
so now, as the hustle of bustlers busy themselves around me and sweep up the dust of the ages so that we can all coat our lungs with the soot of the industrial age mixes with many dead skin cells, we turn down our sensitivities so as not to sneeze, cough, or choke on the thought that everything is part of everything and everything becomes the same when it all turns to dust... and so again, with the taste of everything in our nostrils and oblivion right around the corner, we dance with the deviled eggs in the pale moon light and wait for the cow who is scheduled to jump over the moon any minute now, but then, like trains, cows are notorious for never being on time...
and you wondered what you were going to do with your evening...
well wonder no more, for now, brought to you by the miracle of the internet, you can sit back and click through numerous entries uploaded most recently while you may or may not have been looking or noticing... the beginning is here, in case you wanted to find a very good place to start (A, B, C, and all) and it continues right to where you are, bless your good little parts... yes, you, you right there, you have the golden (or perhaps it's green... or an off shade of puce, even) opportunity to engage your mind in the invigorating exercise of following the bouncing babbler, catching up with the candoor, peering through the smoked glass the view a glimpse of the life in black and white...
yes, behind the candoor lives!...
and there are lives living here too... not all of them imaginary, either... so I give you, my dear sweet children, the naked truth... no worries, it's mostly G rated, even though some P might be spilled, but we don't cry over spilled P, now do we?... no, no, of course not, we forge ahead, making nails or splendor in the grass or some such purpose that someday may become part of the greatest story ever told, or maybe even a comic book...
you may have missed the previous entry, in which case, none of this makes any sense, but then, no worries because it was meant to be this way... yes, that's right, you were not supposed to understand any of it... that's the genius of the folly at the end of the road... 42, and all that rotgut... you are entitled, nay, implored to make anything you wish out of it... print it out and fold it into origumby... or a paper bag to hold your precious jewels... or to hyperventilate into, even... post it on the internet, if you like, or if you think that's been done and pass�, give it to your mother...
it is not a prayer or any sort of sermon, what it is is your reflection in the fun house mirror and if you are not laughing, then perhaps you don't like yourself that much... but once again, no worries, for there is something you can
we conclude this entry (as it is, yet another step along the catch-up trail that began quite suddenly, this summer) by referring you back to the previous entry and the one before that and to many others that will be listed in the entry that finally concludes this multi-day catch up session that we've all been long awaiting... perhaps Smash can explain it better, but then, why even worry over explaining when we are here to enjoy...
no reason required...
PS: no mind-altering substances were abused in the making of this entry...
. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)
< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >
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the moment
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you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...
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