can you say pathetic boys and girls?... I respect bindyree so much for stepping up and stating the truth (and her commenters for supporting it)... lawyers (and ordinary people like the fat woman complaining that her doctor told her she was obese) can make a mockery of the legal system and diminish the respect we have for victims rights... the fact that the state of New Hampshire, where the motto is "live free or die" is considering action against the doctor is unconscionable... stupid, too... what next, sue the candy bar makers for making the candy that clogged your arteries?... The State Vs. Willy Wonka in the matter of Abigail Fatso chocking on Wonka bars after trying to stuff seventeen in her mouth simultaneously... there was no warning label on the Wonka Bar stating that such consumption could be fatal... her family is devastated and someone must be to blame and blaming the stupid is not popular, so let's blame the rich instead...

anybody know where I can get some imported Russian milk?...

speaking of wanting a new drug, I used to have a book called "Be Here Now"... it was a textbook for a psychology class I took at Monterey Community College (California), very hippie-generation... living in the moment (which could be equated as always being prepared for randomness) is definitely the key tom my happiness (and my happiness sure has been tested by all sorts of horrible events and traumas and cruel and unusual peopl and it {my happiness} remains intact and happier that ever most of the moments I remember to live in the moment)... on the other hand, treating moments like grains of sand does let most of life, including the people, slip through my fingers... so I think we've got to balance living in the moment with building a great memory bank and maintaining bonds with those who matter, those who love us and nurture us and help us learn and grow... when I have it all figured out, maybe I'll write a book and call it "Be Here Now and Keep in Touch" or "Stay Here Now" or something like that :)

I'd like to thank vodkavases for inspiring those last thoughts...

continuing along a rather random path through my mind and the internet, I just re-read the book of Genesis (well, sorta) and realized that it was written by someone with some ridiculous fear of nudity and without that ridiculous fear of nudity, there's no point to the story... you suddenly find out you're naked... my reaction would either be "So?"... or "Cool"...

I suppose that would make me some sort of evil person condemned to burn in hell in the eyes of the minority of the world who believe in the bible as the end all be all text to explain everything... seems unfinished to me... like there must be a punch line or something...

seriously, does ththe whole premise make any sense?... give free will and demand blind obedience?... and fear gets you into heaven?... maybe because fear turns life on Earth into hell, anywhere is heaven after a life lived based on fear of most things natural...

it just doesn't make sense for an all-knowing, all-powerful, good and loving diety to want his most beloved creation to fear him and live in ignorance, so fearful of knowledge and natural beauty and themselves that they do harm in this all-loving being's name...

and to create a brain that can think and reason and learn and then deliberately try to keep the brain ignorant and unused?... it be like saying yes you have two legs, but don't be walking around on them now or I'll break them both... why bother creating something as amazing as the human brain just to let it vegetate?... I think there must have been more to the story than they wrote down...

maybe they needed a bigger Lego set...

speaking of children's toys and games, is she the next big thing?... you can listen for yourself... teeny-bopper rap?... well, we'll just have to wait and see what develops for the twelve year old Britney-SnoopDog-Madonnna-50cent wanna be... props to Red, the Zombie, for pointing out that the kid deserves A for effort and for reminding me that Halifax has good vibs...

speaking of being offensive to the masses by using the brain, I know I've mentioned the misanthropic bitch before, but it's probably been at least a year or more since I did so I was happy to see that her emails are still coming to one of my addresses (the good thing about using this desktop is I might actually check some of the mail that's been pouring into it (when the addresses are not bouncing) for the past year or so... a few gigabytes, at least, sit on this hard drive... talk about needles in haystacks, I've got some wondrous stuff lost in the crazy-long lists (think Bruce Almighty) of emails... I don't delete some of it because I keep hoping my filters are working and some treasured mail will be found one day... yeah, that's me, ever the hopeful dreamer, but we were talking about the bitch, so let's get out of this parentheses)... anyway, she's not updating her website, but still sends out email entries about once a month, more or less... I strongly urge you to check her out... I've enjoyed her since 1997...

since the start she reminded me of a friend from New Jersey, someone I shared many thousands of words with during the mid-late eighties and early nineties and one more person I miss dearly... one day I'll try to recover the letters and rhymes I wrote from storage and share some more history... one day...

oh no, not the storage stuff lament again...

instead, I followed a link over to myspace (where I have a myspace too, though I do not use it except to be able to leave comments) and I'm still not sure just what myspace is about... I mean, I clicked on rank and the most popular highest rated myspacer doesn't blog at all and is not even looking at the camera, so connecting in any meaningful way is apparently not the point...

and then I find tawny and fall in love with her voice and music in like, seven notes... impulsive, yes I am... in fact, she inspired me to use myspace for the second time (other than to comment)... I pressed the Add to Friends link... the second song I listened to did not impress me nearly as much as the first... she's forming a band... I loved the idea of inserting a music player right into the blog... maybe it's the tools at myspace that attract people there (and not just the superficiality of pictures)...

in fact, the four top rated myspacers don't blog at all, just have pictures up... the fifth is a music video blog of sorts, which has merit other than just being libido food... maybe it's more a singles network type site than a writing type site... and you know me, I'm all about the words...

and I miss music again (lament)...

I am going to the temporary internet files soon to see if I can copy and save the music I am listening to because a second song just seduces me... anyway, I decided to do the superficial thing, though the ranked myspacers bored me with no words... I started browsing by clicking on browsing (how clever) and I shall relate some of my journey through myspace (which would actually be browsing through theirspace, but then, well, you know)...

I next stumbled into Courtney who also had music on her site and though she appears, at first glance, rather full of herself, she does blog... age is not just a number on myspace, it's an unreliable number most of the time... same can be said for most of the personal profile data... I just because 99 years old there today, which is younger than the first time I signed up... anyway, Courtney looks about fifteen, but lists at twenty-seven and she earns a comfortable income... and I remembered what I do not like about myspace blogs, navigation and modification of profile details, or lack thereof... it reminds me too much of a dating site in that respect...

maybe it's an LA thing...

so anyway, I decided to let libido do the browsing (just to fit in, of course... I mean, I wouldn't want the photo-focused people to be all offended by my deep-thinking rhetoric, after all) and glanced through comments and saw karl standing there in her underwear (well, actually she's kneeling on a bed and looking kinda spacey) and decided to click and found more music, this time with a video playing... I find myspace can be very challenging to my old computer space, but all the more attractive because of the sounds and sights... wait, that's not karl, it's kari... the font she chose blurs a bit, even on my 21 inch screen... I was amused by the song left as a comment... that's cool, leaving a song as a comment... another plus for myspace (see, I'm not all down on it... it looks like it could be much fun with the right computer)...

and I remember another reason I rarely go there... my lack of computer power... it's easier on this desktop, with a DSL connection and twice the memory and CPU speed, but it's still way slow for the high tech stuff... not myspace's fault, however, so I continue my exploring, at least until the computer crashes)... another reason is I have no volume control on this laptop and I have to wait for a page to load before I can turn down the volume and I'm not into suddenly waking roommates because a song popped on by surprise at a rather high volume on a page that takes thirty seconds or a minute to load... like Ryan (who appears to be King, and has lots of songs playing that are hopefully downloading to my computer so I can save them... I wonder if that's why he's king)...

some people have an easy URL listed and some don't, what's up with that?... I much prefer the easy URL... but then, some people have age listed and some don't, same for other info... maybe there are controls I have not seen in the profile editing section...

it seems unfortunate, at least to my libido, that I reached Alexa after she took down most of her photos... she created the group that celebrates the kindship of Ryan, mentioned above... so i didn't actually click over to her because she's a beautiful model, I clicked over cuz she created the group celebrating Ryan... but it's still unfortunate for libido because she appears to be quite appealing... both Ryan and Alexa have sites that are so busy and full of graphics that much of it is lost due to too much scrolling and they definitely were not easy downloads, but the candy inspired my smile (even though I'm not into that candy much, the colors are great) and the music... yeah, I buy it, Ryan is King... another Californian... Alexa is apparently a model based in the midwest, but wants to be a Californian... myspace, so far, does appear to be very Southern California based...

when I lived there, I loved it most of the time... sometimes I think probably should move back... but then, the aspects I did not like, the plastic pop culture and expensiveness, well... come to think of it, Florida and Orlando may be even more plastic pop culture, so it's probably mostly the expensiveness that is the primary drawback... I'm not into that money-making game right now...

overall, at least so far, I sense a rather closed shop at myspace and an attitude of "I'm too good for you, bug off" (of course that's just because most of the first few myspaces that did have words (and not just pictures) emphasized the negative, that is, strongly suggested most people should just go away and leave them alone)... on the other hand, it, like most other diary journal blog sites, seem to have much faster servers than DLand...

anyway, the songs continue to download (but we may have reached the end of the loop) and as if everything's connected (synchronicity), as the computer starts slowing down (and one of the IE windows crashes), I start closing other windows and before I do, insatiable browsing junkie that I am, I click on a banner and find myself reading about Ryan... the same Ryan?... apparently not as one is in CAli and the other in Washington state and one has a steady love interest (a Queen, no less) and the other confessed deepening feelings for Chris who is torn by distance and has feelings for many (it all gets so complicated sometimes, aye?) probably because she appeals to so many so well (I am adoring how she puts herself out here in cyberspace... it could be another hit reality show, not that we need one, but I would cheer her on cuz she deserves success)...

and there goes the computer c-r-a--ss=-hhhhhhh...

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)