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2003-11-10 - 10:32 p.m. the usual ten minutes away from having to walk out the door to go to work, I finally decide to sit down here on the edge of the big green chair to write a few words for today... today, like most days, had twenty-four hours in it... twenty-two and a half of them have passed... the first eight hours were spent at work... then a few hours were spent heating up leftovers, eating, checking fantasy sports websites, checking mail, exploring a bit more, and adding a new page to my list of favorite entries... haunting seems to be the path leading to there at the moment, maybe because I have been so dead in mostlydead for so long... anyway, after that I went to bed... I woke a couple of times to use the bathroom, awakened by feeling bloated... not enough exercise (especially abdominals), too much meat-bread-cheese food, not enough veggies (none for two days, at least), and the usual blase blahs lead to constipation (science, huh?) and a slight frontal lobe over-and-behind-the-eyes headache and I'm fresh out of fruits, veggies, and prune juice... and I don't like taking medicine... maybe I'll get smart and run in the morning (more likely I'll be too tired and apathetic and blase... I don't think I am spelling blase right... maybe it's the missing accent)... but I did not come here to whine... I would love to be able to say I woke up to passion, to love, to titillating sex, or even to a simple hug... no such luck today... the small empty bed has brand new clean sheets (black) and the room smells fresh and clean since it was cleaned this weekend, but nobody shared it last night... I would like to be able to say I am falling in love, but alas, nobody inspires that today... I would like to be able to say I discovered something new and exciting that changes everything again, but it's just more of the usual... and nobody wants to share the usual... or at least, nobody does... I find the commercials for Brittney Spears interview, concert, Behind the Music (she's flooding the media again, huh?) boring... yes, in spite of her bottom... the cats are sleeping on the floor, apparently no longer feeling welcome in Rasputin's bed since the little one has been peeing in it a lot lately... both are still here, in spite of Raspy's raging swearing the little one has got to go... kind heart, smelly sheets... my door remains closed to them as their pee habits are not welcome in my room... there, that is the excitement for today... no pee... so far... it would be nice to get some more friendly email... it would be nice to get some caring phone calls... it would be nice to have someone knock on my door looking for me... but I don't know if I am really ready to play one on one with anybody, no less get serious with anyone one on one... the cutie at work confided in me again last night, but she plays even more than I do... I just sit and listen, she is good at sharing depths while playing keep away... odd couple, no doubt... another little sister, since I am caring about her now... but we know how even family commitments dissolve so easily sometimes... where is mine? (gone, as usual)... I am now at least five minutes late for work... I really do not feel like going, but I shall close this entry now and head out the door... at least I am keeping my commitment to do my best to get an entry in here every day... for what it's worth... how are you?
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