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last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


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CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
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FAT MAN WALKING
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last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
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REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
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itools references
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Giga-Quotes
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all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
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Monday Madness
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(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
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let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2005-03-21 - 5:33 p.m.

stumbling toward harmony


well, DLand is still not allowing new entries in free diaries (at least I could not get an Add an entry window open in a hundred clicks), so the latest CD Stack that has been playing for a few days now will not come up yet... maybe I should put it here, but then, that defeats the purpose of having a separate diary just for the music playing in my ears... maybe that's the point of this Dland massacre, to cut back on the free diaries and encourage more people to pay... I pay for two, so I keep some free ones and feel no guilt... not that I feel guilt about anything... I'm innocent, after all...

speaking of innocent, the adorable little cherubs (ok, they're not so little and not very cherub... then again, one is rather a little pixie and the other is a big cherub, but I am digressing)... Precious and Heidi just walked in from their Exchange student meet-and-greet party... they say the party might have gone on another few hours, but Rasputin could not stay awake any longer... I am in a similar state of grogginess, but I have just rambled out an email and decided to see if I could upload the CD Stack and here we are...

Rasputing flaunted the fact that there were bodies in bikinis to drool over at the pool there... suddenly I feel like Robin William's lover in The Birdcage, but before I break into the songs of La Cage Aux Folles I'll remember that I am not a prima donna drag queen and accept that I was the mature one who did not drool over sixteen and seventeen year olds in bikinis... string bikinis?... never mind...

ok, I jest... he's a good daddy and he didn't drool either...

much...

down boy...

now where were we?... ah yes, remembering filling out those "what do you want to be when you grow up?" questionnaires in school... would you be terribly shocked if I occasionally entered "dirty old man?"... actually, we were contemplating the future of keeping free diaries here at DLand... I could put the free ones elsewhere... like on my own domain, since I've had one for more than five years and it's paid up through 2013... it'll be good if the world does not end in 2012 then...

the exhibitionist in me (this is a segue, trust me) wants to just post the entire email I just wrote cuz I'm just too tired to edit out any bits that shouldn't be posted if there are any and there's stuff in it about how I think and feel and you might want to know more about me... at least I hope you do... but respect wins out even over sleepiness and I shall leave the email in the to be edited file for when I find time to cull out for this space anything that I feel you might find interesting... I might have even gotten a little vulnerable, revealing, or interesting, but then, who am I to judge...

I know I said the past eight entries are incomplete and yes, they remain incomplete and probably will through tomorrow as the hope of getting seven hours sleep that I expressed at the end of that email I keep mentioning has now dwindled to six and a half hours at absolute wake-up-rushing-out-the-door max... all work and no play makes cadoor a dull boy... I suddenly want to be a teenager again... and no, it's not just the hormones talking...

for the record (and to vent a bit of momentary frustration), the ATT servers still suck porcupine dick cuz they keep disconnecting me and won't let me download email or even stay connected to browse today (maybe it senses I should sleep)... it's disconnected thirty times in the past fifteen minutes citing error 629 (anybody who knows what that means, please enlighten me)... I dial up and reconnect again without much problem except every third or fourth time when it disconnects immediately after connecting... porcupine dick, remember... maybe some aardvark too...

ok, so I am masturbating a lot more often lately... you dragged it out of me... once a day is just not enough anymore... Alicia Keys plays in my ears, since you wanted to know that too... you ask a lot of personal questions, don't you?...

sometimes my hand and sometimes a pillow...

anyway, I finally found some notes (thank you very much) after a week without any... my addiction to your notes was tested and I survived, but just barely... and I pondered the question of Veganism in a response note that I shall share here for anyone who cares...

mostly money... the ethical calling of the vegan gave way to the fact that I did not want to continue doing what I had to do to earn the income it takes to pay for a serious Vegan life... and then a relationship with four kids to feed came along... and then abject poverty when I was taken for everything I had by said relationship... free soup kitchens do not cater to Vegans... I am not and never was a big fan of meats of any kind (though spices make anything taste better)... I prefer fish, of the meat categories... and I love cheese... and ice cream... pizza and ice cream, I can live on the stuff... anyway, that's why the Vegan in me lightened up on the ethical issues... maybe the food chain makes some sense too... and who says plants don't feel their own death... but I still prefer foods that don't have big innocent eyes

so in a nutshell, I found it challenging to remain a Vegan when I became a Vagabond, puns and alliteration intended... and just to be consistent and mention how lonely I am in every entry I've ever written anywhere, I mean, in case the one is watching, there's still room in my nutshell for two (or more, if you've got more)...

this entry has been going on for an hour now... which means the hope for six hours sleep is dwindling by the minute... but we're having too much fun and don't want to miss anything, right?... don't worry, I take bathroom breaks... my best friend in first grade used to wet his pants rather than go inside because we were having too much fun playing with out gang outside and he didn't want to miss anything... he's a professional in the midwest somewhere now... yes, I have his email address somewhere... no he's not a professional bedwetter... yes, I have the email address of my first girlfriend somewhere too... no, I don't correspond regularly with anybody... I think it's because I don't want to disappoint them cuz they had such high hopes and expectations for me...

so what else is new?...

Alicia Keys is sounding a little bit like Pink to me at the moment... am I tired or does anybody else hear a similarity... it's in the whine, I think... or maybe the wine... I want to party... but I don't want to party alone... and I don't know what I want to party with... I am not a big fan of alcohol... nor is my liver or other vital organs... but an alternative consciousness would be nice about now... sleep?... yes, I suppose that qualifies... but it's usually so unconscious...

I want to sing at the party... Karaoke?... maybe... duets would be good... and gang bang songs (everybody sing at once, not sex... goodness, you think that's all I think about?)... and if you all insist, ok, a few solos...

I want a long party...

when I was sixteen, my girlfriend (who is same girlfriend mentioned above) and her best friend (who I adored too) made me a surprise Sweet 16 party complete with the hat and stuff animals and giant card and other traditions... I used to cry every time I heard Neil Sedaka sing Happy Birthday Sweet 16... yeah, I can be quiet sappy at times...

the Sedaka song became sadder after Amy, who was the reason I broke up with the girlfriend mentioned above... we parted just two weeks before her Sweet 16 so we didn't get to dance as we planned all year... it was a very weird and spacey December... ever hear Most Beautiful Girl sung by Charlie Rich?...

I don't want to cry anymore...

I think I should look for some Freddie Mercury and blast Someone To Love... and some Grace Slick Somebody To Love too... are you feeling me feeling you?... sing for me, sing with me (and where is my Christine?), the music of the night...

I think I should look for some Freddie Mercury and blast Someone To Love... and some Grace Slick Somebody To Love too... are you feeling me feeling you?... sing for me, sing with me (and where is my Christine?), the music of the night...

I did push ups and some upper body work earlier... all the more reason to get some sleep... first exercise I've done in months... I left that out of the email when I was reviewing the influences that lead a bit of waking up and maybe to some decent exposure today... or indecent... waking the body up is always a precarious balance... another tape lost in Toronto...

atop thinking of hat is lost*... the glass is half full, keep focused on the positive... the possible... what can still be... I can fall in love again, I'm old, not ancient... and we could die at any moment and if you don't really know this then you're missing out on the essense of life... there are no rules, really... unless you want some... for me, it's just do no harm, whenever possible...

g'nite...




*yes, that was supposed to read: stop thinking that all is lost...






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the moment

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