LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

Candoor: Blogmad? It's better than ever! Get more visitors (or find me in chat there). Register now and tell me for extra credits. VARB?


JOIN OR RE-REGISTER NOW

welcome blogmadians... and the rest of you, while still in beta, you can still join the latest greatest party on the web, blogmad!

SUPPORT BLOGMAD! BUY STUFF



o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-08-17 - 1:12 p.m.

some nights


some nights there's nothing at all in my head ready to form into words and come out through my fingers... no matter what I do, all I seem to want to do is sleep or stare into space until I sleep... even though I tell myself (and believe) that I really want to write, I am at a loss for words... this is one of those nights and after twenty minutes of staring at nothing (but not letting myself fall asleep because I am at work), I return to the keyboard and put my fingers on keys and what you are reading is what happened... or is happening, if you look at it from my point of view...

spacing out, the final frontier...

I was doing fine until I paused to eat some chicken and potatoes and beans that was purchased for a staff's birth day... and now, as if there was strong sleep-inducing medication in the dang food, I feel like falling over and playing narcoleptic... I wonder if narcolepsy can be correlated well enough with night shift workers to become considered a natural effect and official night shift work hazard, therein qualifying those susceptible for workman's compensation... yes, just one more in a long list of potential retirement plans I come up with sitting here through the long hours of the night...

I'm thinking this plan could be better than the plan to commit some harmless white collar crime and get put in one of those country club prisons for my golden years... I'm easy, I just want some fresh air, some healthy food, and a computer with high speed internet...

no worries, sometimes I don't know when to take myself seriously either...

sometimes?...

I can do anything just like you
...

I am sooo misunderstood...

but I always take chocolate seriously...


and music, I would love to follow bands around when I retire...

you?...

personally, I think chocolate has magic in it, along with it's many other ingredients... for me, there is no better drug... it does what I want it to do... it empowers me... it wakes me up... it puts me to sleep... it opens my mind... it brings me peace... it gives me strength to carry on... it gives me more tolerance and patience... it makes me crazy...

the only other drug that even came close to doing for me what chocolate does is marijuana and I haven't seen hide nor hair of that substance in a long time (I miss it now and then, but it's expensive and I left behind my drug experiment stage some time ago after trying everything as much as I wanted to and besides, being in a hospital field where drug testing is an anytime option for management, I stay away from the illegal substances even more)... it's ok if my blood test comes back saying my blood is seventy five percent chocolate...

yes, I've tried most everything I could try at least once... and with the right company, I'll try anything new or again, whichever comes first... the right company being someone who instantly earns my trust... yes, trust, not lust... someone who instantly earns my lust can get a lot from me, but not anything and certainly not everything... lust is such a transient thing, and everything is forever...

if you know what I mean...

I've gotten in the habit of drinking coffee at work again and lately I add some chocolate to it because chocolate is available... mocha is not as good as pure chocolate, but the double whammy of caffeine is helpful in keeping me awake on nights when I must isolate myself from my co-workers in order to either get work done or monitor the patients more closely, which is a regular thing here...

I think I am about ready for a change, reluctant as I am to give up these hours of writing time, maybe taking a position off the units that is more involved in system operations and less directly involved in patient care would be a good move for me right about now... and maybe I am trying to talk myself into the possible benefits of such a change and hope the possible drawbacks are not as bad as they might be...

but the big news that has nothing to do with anything else (except that I would actually share all of my chocolate for her) is that I am in love again... oh sure, it's far away fantasy love, but I did stand just a few feet away from her stunned by her adorability and now, listening to her singing, I have succumbed to my most precious true love fantasies and I am ready to spend the rest of my life worshipping her (or at least as long as shell have me)...

did I say this before
it feels like the first time
but then it always does
when it's true love

music and words can seduce me easier and better than anything (no, the way to my heart is not through my stomach, though great cooking helps intensify the experience as all senses want to participate in the fall, after all)... and as I've been known to do in the past, I let the music (and a voice) into my head (and when it reaches my heart, there's infinity plus one)... add to it what my eyes and ears call adorableness (there's no definition, it's a biochemical magical reaction) and I am a puddle of mush that can be molded into whatever...

usually I do the molding because the inspiration is mostly fantasy and nobody else is around to do the molding and I don't function too well as a puddle of mush for too long... I mean, puddles of mush have a difficult time going to work or eating, even... and while I'll happily die for love when necessary, I don't see much point in dying as a muddle of mush for someone who remains a fantasy and may never know... save a life, sure...

so anyway, I guess I found something to say after all...

in case you missed it, the entry before this one was written after this one started and still may be incomplete, but I left this one at work and just finished it, so it's here now... and in case you haven't been paying attention this week (or this is your first visit in more than eight days), there are more than fifty new entries that were not here the last time you were here and they all start with that link on the left that says IT BEGINS HERE (clever, I know)... and in the next few hours (or soon), the final catch-up entry will be uploaded and we will have RealTime in life in black and white right here behind the candoor for the first time since late June... fascinated, aren't you?... well, at least now you know and have the chance to read this sort of babble for the next few hours...

I appreciate your being crazy like me J






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

.

.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

.

.

.

.

AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




(EXPERIMENTAL PLAYTHINGS)
RSS?



who links here
blogwise
Blogarama
Globe of Blogs
blogthings

~ BLOGLINKERS ~




~ BLOGROLLING ~
(Blogroll RSS)


Blogroll Me!

published
blogadvance
blogazoo
blogexplosion
blogmad?
bloglines



(PREVIOUS TEMPORARY ATTRACTIONS)
TSUNAMI INFO
fantasy sports?
BLOGGIES?
sorry everybody
Orange Blossom Music Festival

Deland Music Festival
MIT Survey

brilliant idea
Celebrate Birthdays
FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
talking dog






SAY HELLO
407-325-1482





and if you want to leave
take good care
hope you make a lot
of true friends out there