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PO BOX 780398
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send me some music
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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2003-12-20 - 4:47 p.m.

living in a snow globe


well, this came at about the perfect time (it was sent to candora and inspired wonder and laughing and searching and dreaming and wandering and escape and fantasy and that's where I've been and what happened... you see (if you wanna), I just woke up and sat down in the big green chair in a just-awakened stupor (with a touch of a sugar hangover) and checked email and found I had a note and checked notes and found that my favorite gump (as opposed to all the other gumps out there, I suppose... no offense to Forest) had sent me to a surprise web thing... is there anything wrong with finding this particular web thing hours of fun?... ok, maybe not hours... at least a half an hour slipped by before I realized I was still watching the little characters play in this imaginary snow world... I miss fun...

I also wake up in a rather simplistic state easy-to-amuse sometimes... reborn each time I open my eyes, remember?... anyway, it was and is about time candora woke up and it appears that is all I will accomplish today, but then, that is plenty if you like creative babble or just love me...

but just to give you something less emotional to read, I provide last week's Friday Five (I think this was the one they dated the 12th) for you information hounds out there...

1. Do you enjoy the cold weather and snow for the holidays?


what an appropriate question for last night (or tonight, perhaps, check the next entry to see) for I actually sat here in long PJs with cold fingers for the first time this year... see, the windows remain open a bit and the temperature has been dropping to near freeze warnings in parts of Florida... around here, people are panicking as they so often do when the weather drops below fifty degrees (that is considered winter in these parts)... but to answer the question, I love snow when dressed for it and there's a hot fire to go back to... even more fun when there's someone to play with and a warm cuddly body unchill with... but overall, I enjoy cold weather and snow only as a visitor, I for most of the time I love warm tropical climates most...


2. What is your ideal holiday celebration? How, where, with whom would you celebrate to make things perfect?

loved unconditionally... holidays are every day... being alive... watching the sun rise or set... seeing a flower bloom... watching waves play with the shore... feeling rain... remembering... any day is a holiday, it's just choosing a reason (or no reason) to celebrate... this is my way of living and dealing with life and probably comes from dealing with the answer to the next question...


3. Do you do have any holiday traditions?

no... if traditions would be definied as family history, activities passed on from generation to generation and such, then my lack of cohesive family history (adopted, no bio-family, disjointed disfunctional and anything but celebratory adopted families) would lead to the no answer... heck, birthday cards were not the norm for me, no less gifts or religions or traditions... so I have my own calendar of memory-holidays and watch others celebrate their holidays and join in whenever I can as much as I can... usually I am the outsider, the stranger stopping by for a little holiday cheer... would be nice to have family, but I am not sure I believe in it anymore...


4. Do you do anything to help the needy?

yes... first, by not being one as much as possible (which is more challenging in recent years than ever before in this life since I basically gave up most interest in anything material and have become way more ambivalent about money and stuff than is wise according to current cultural standards)... I give a lot away, time, energy, and stuff, always have... I give less each year partly because I have less and partly because I tired of doing it all by myself and haven't had a life partner in recent years... being a hermit makes for less opportunities for helping others...


5. What one gift would you like for yourself?

winning lottery tickets?... well, I'd have a whole lot more to give away and could retire and buy a social life as I have in the past, so that would be three major changes for the better I guess... I think that what I would like to give myself most is to get all my stuff out of storage and available to me again, especially the music and the ability to listen, play, and record... so music and computer stuff would be the stuff-type gift answer to this question... but the one gift?... unconditional love and trust... being in love again with someone who will do it with me so we could get it right this time... that's the gift I'd like most of all...



just when you thought it was gonna be a short entry, huh?... well, I have been in a rhyming mode today so if you are not a rhyme fan, just be glad I left the rhymes over in other places and didn't rhyme your world here... maybe you are starting to get to know me and decide whether you like me and want to know more and be a friend by now... has this diary reached a hundred entries yet?... sure have been plenty of words to peruse...

I wonder what you think...






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