LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-11-24 - 2:20 a.m.

referrals and revelations


are you startled by the sunrise?
does a sunset bring on tears?
do you ever feel you are wise?
or are you all fears?

do you think that when you think a thought it appears
and when you forget it disappears?
real or illusion or some sort of confusion
is life just the mask it wears?


this is an entry of bits and pieces and comments I left or words left for me... these are words I want to save for one reason or another and so I put them into my babbling books because they've become part of this life in black and white behind the candoor... sometimes I remember where the words came from and sometimes I don't... it's often more interesting and possibly more meaningful when I wonder because wondering is the start of all knowledge, a journey called learning...

this is my favorite thing to do in life, to learn (though I don't think I want to take it as far as the condition Drew Barrymore has in 50 First Dates even if the movie inspires tears every time... and I don't mean a tear, I mean gushing sniffling dripping tears... feel free to make fun, I wouldn't want to be any other way... there are lots of movies that can do that for me because I love a good cathartic emotional experience and most times tears are part of it, even when the emotions are primarily laughter... it's that sensitivity I elude to now and then (maybe in a recent entry, even, but these are catch up entries so there's much less organization and/or cohesion than there is in regular entries and there it's debatable there's much then)...

she only sings on days she meets you...

ah, if they could see you now, that little gang of mine... seven, there were seven... sometimes a few more... but back to the thought, learning now (and learning now at that), if you canae, savvy?)... knowing is a plateau, a rest stop along the journey where we sort and catalogue all we've learned into longer memories... but it is the constant learning experience of living in the moment, moments that matter the most for that is the most real experience there really is to experience in this life... every moment is the first moment to experience that moment...

think about it...

anyway, here are the words I wanted to save in no particular order and with a bit of commentary around them when commentary comes to mind... if you recognize them as yours, or to you, thanks many more times than I've thanked you already and feel free to stick your tongue out at all the jealous people who did not write or inspire the words... or just take a more humble or even a silent bow if that suits you more...

beautiful person, remember to feel the joy in the peace of letting go of the pain and the memories those loved will retain and the hope that today will bring some good news because that is why we have the right to choose to be happy and thankful for each moment we are alive... let death remind us to treasure each moment and enjoy life and let it be a habit so we don't have to wait to remember until death arrives...



it would appear that someone died, obviously, and I reflected on my perspective of dying or passing on or leaving this plane of existence as we know it or whatever we call it... I do not think of death often within myself, but I see it around me all the time when I open my eyes and it saddens me to see so many choose it when there are so many other choices available...

I move on to another thought, or perhaps an extension...

love yourself first and leave those who leave you behind and if they come around because you were once easy for them and they're lonely and want someone who'll cater to them the way it once was, count the days since the last time you really knew you were loved and wait twice that many days before you let them into your trust again... if they wait that long without any push or anger or tripping and still come around, then let them start showing you what someone who loves you should do, not what they did before, let them give time and attention and ask for and take nothing in return until you are sure you want to give something - not out of past illusions, memories, or loneliness, but out of caring now and trust built on what you share today... and that's all I've got to say about that, whatever it was J



seems to be a loss, though not a death, a break-up or betrayal... and there's mathematics involved, did you notice?... so cleverly the analytical portions of the brain slip mathematics into an otherwise emotional experience... I think it soothes us, somehow, to use that more advanced (or is it just more complex, which is a whole other thought stream to explore someday) aspect of our brains when the primal cells fire too sharply... I wonder, as I reflect on the words almost as if I am reading them for the first time, if you see anything of what I see and before I even started this paragraph or any paragraph, what do you see?...

and what is your highest high and how do you get there?...

how did The Who put it, but no one had the guts to leave the temple... and here I am pondering wandering wondering if I have been sitting still long enough to restore my faith, memorialize the love, resurrect the hope, and continue actively, personally, and intimately with a single bonding to keep my promise long forgotten by those I gave it to... in the end, beneath a banner of solar lights, we face ourselves and if we look away, we miss the life we lived and may still live, for the life that could have been...



trading the real for the dream, trading the opportunity for the memory, trading the life for the death, this is what I see so many (everyone, perhaps) do all the time... but where do we meet?... and what do we do there? (or better yet, do we ever?)... so much water under the bridge, so many chocolate morsels slipping through the fingers and turning white on convenient store shelves because the temperature constantly changes causing oil migration (am I losing you?)... is really doesn't matter if I'm wrong or right, where I belong I'm right, where I belong...

treasure your moments as your moments, as I treasure mine as mine, and never doubt how the story will turn out, for it is one moment you awake amidst a million moments of sleep...



and it really doesn't matter what I say or where because, believe it or not, 99% of what I post on the internet is not even noticed, maybe not even read, definitely not commented upon (so how would I know if it's noticed or read)... and that's not a plea for comments, mind you, for here I ponder the thought in the midst of a multi-entry upload in the middle of the night and what?... one of you, maybe a few, will find time to read through it all?... so what's the point?... wasted time?... the Eagles?... fountain of sorrow?... Jackson Browne?... the late show?... TV zombies?... and I close my eyes and watch my world unfold before me... Linda Ronstadt?... is anybody out there?... REM?... is this logical?... Supertramp?... does anybody care?... Harry Chapin?... is it 4am yet?... Carpenters?... but if I was a carpenter and you were a lady, so what?... let's not let religion influence the time in a bottle... Jim Croche?... or John Denver, even...

what started out as random thoughts have disintegrated into references so intricately connecting deeply woven in the semi-conscious mind between sleep and awake that only one might understand if you were here within my mind right now


and so my dear precious few readers who found these words... no pity, for pity is a waste of time... and I hope you don't miss the point... I don't expect these words to be read... I don't expect anyone to truly understand... I've accessed being alone deep down at my core in this life and while that broke my heart at first, it's the truest reality and therein, the ultimate peace and security and fun... though the illusion of sharing everything remains woven into my psyche as the best dream I ever had outside of my head, the true playground is here, all by myself alone, just me and the words...

and if you happen along, I hope you had fun too...

especially if you inspire me to want to save some of the words you inspired (and maybe that's what an entry like this is all about... for my memory, for posterity, and for anyone who happens to stumble along someday... you missed the party once, maybe twice, but as long as you have a glimmer of consciousness and understanding, you can enjoy it all over again in your head where the true reality begins and ends...

cheers and yay (whenever you get it) J






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




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.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

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AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
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A Diaryland Survey
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your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
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gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
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browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


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