LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

Candoor: Blogmad? It's better than ever! Get more visitors (or find me in chat there). Register now and tell me for extra credits. VARB?


JOIN OR RE-REGISTER NOW

welcome blogmadians... and the rest of you, while still in beta, you can still join the latest greatest party on the web, blogmad!

SUPPORT BLOGMAD! BUY STUFF



o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-12-19 - 4:07 a.m.

personally, I don't believe in personal ads


ok, so as I mentioned in another space that I copied to the previous entry, I added yet another online personal ad to my repertoire as I gradually become the man of a thousand personal ads... such a strange and wonderful excitement rushes through me every time I click on the upload button on one of those personal ad sights... almost as much as the rush I get from clicking upload on any of my diaries, journals, or blog sites... there's that underlying and never dying hope that somebody will read something I upload and feel something good... and maybe even reach out and maybe even become a friend and maybe even fall in love...

and then again, I can be quite cynical and flippant and irreverent in a personal ad... so anyway, this is what came out of my recent trip to a local personal ad sight that's hardly off the ground yet:

I don't fit in a single box (unless maybe a box labeled 'different' or 'weird'). Every category requires explaining, so this is where I'll explain when I have time. For now, take the profile answers with a grain of salt and ask for more if you actually want to know me. Here are some ice-breakers: NYC, Cali, music, words, writing, reading, caring, sharing, helping, taking it to the limit, being true to ideals, friends, dreams, family, wanting to share everything... and knowing we are always alone.

I am an open book. Your questions turn the pages and there are a lot of pages (literally and figuratively). I write daily. You can learn a lot from my online rambles and rhymes. I wonder if I am allowed to put links in here?

I will test your sense of humor because I am testing mine most of the time. I am alive to enjoy life and do my best to do just that. I mean no harm, but take no prisoners. I find humor in everything and hope to find someone else as seriously irreverent (and irreverently serious) as me.

Always take me with a grain of salt (or some metaphoric spice) and always ask me for clarification if you don't get it (and if you ever think I meant any harm, you didn't get it). I have yet to meet another as serious or as silly as me. I am here because anything is possible.



interjecting between part one and two of this three part description of who I am and what I think and do and want, I sense a bit of tongue in cheek challenging going on (maybe it was the influence of Indiana as Meg and Dia sang I can do whatever I want, like you or maybe it was the sugar rush of the holidays or maybe the idea that I want someone to know me before thinking they like me (or fall in love, no less) and so the babbler takes over and dances a jig and dares the person to figure out what should be taken seriously... ya know?...

anyway, moving right along to part two now:

We do not see things as they are, we see things as we are.

Appearance may be is everything, appearance may be nothing, but it's probably somewhere in between. Hair is long these days and the right person can do as they please with it. I am no judge of my features, I've known myself too long and have come to love, so am too biased. I once wrote a thousand words when asked for a picture, not everybody got it. I am comfortable, but much more comfortable when I am not slacking maintaining optimal fitness (like right now).

Encouragement to run and work out is appreciated (I'll love you forever if you take me to my limits, or even close). No offense intended, but I have enough couch potato influences (and love them dearly, but would rather not follow in their lack of footsteps). I don't know what beauty is for anyone but me and for me, it is honesty, true love, an open heart and mind, innocence, insatiable curiosity, wise fearlessness, and secure peace (for starters).

I believe here is a world of difference between physical attraction and beauty. I have a narrow libido window and only a few turn me on and only those few are welcome to share sexual pleasures, but I find beauty in almost everything.

Laugh and you are beautiful, but if you are beautiful to me when you cry, that is real attraction. It's all about eye of the beholder, you know? You like what you see and feel, it's beautiful. You don't like, it's not.

I do not believe in growing old (and growing up is for sissies). You can find me in the first few rows of the most any concert I can afford to attend, usually right in front of the mosh pit, bouncing more than most of the crowd. You can also find me enthralled in a live show or even a movie, becoming part of the performances (but I've learned to sit still and transcend the body). You can find me running around with kids at any theme park, wishing they had more energy. You can find me running on the beach or laying on the grass in a park counting stars, sighing over the diminishing number still visible, but mostly feeling one unique part of an infinite universe.

I'll make an appearance almost anywhere, except where negativity is created or encouraged. I enjoy being me and call this body home, so I can find fun most anywhere I roam.



I don't know about you or any stranger, but I would want to meet me... of course I love a rambling mind that sticks a tongue out in the middle of a first hello... I mean, just look at one of my favorite people at myspace if you don't believe me... after reading this part two I loved parts of it, but also must realize that some of it is wishful thinking and I leave out the fact that I sit way too much these days... but then, I don't want to attract anyone who is as or more sedentary than I am so I'm challenging myself to step up my own activities and energy level, which works for me...

on to part three in which I ponder who I'm looking for:

In activity partners I seek an intense enthusiasm for the activity and a willingness and ability to share not just the experience, but the perspective that playing the game is the goal, winning or losing is the end of the game.

Any musicians out there interested in collaborating on songs, you are wanted in my world. I love to sing, but have let my diaphragm atrophy and wish upon a star for a nurturing partner in song (or a deaf audience).

In a friend I seek honesty and harmless intent, openness, and a desire to unconditionally love and trust. For me, you must be a friend before I want you any closer unless there is a mutual physical attraction and we're both actually cool with being each other's sex toys. Rarely do I meet anyone actually cool with that, but it is possible.

I didn't sign up here to find sex. Romance, perhaps, but that requires a lot more than words, it requires shared time in physical space. I believe in love at first sight, but also believe it's wishful thinking. I believe wishes and dreams can come true. I tend to like to see things from many different perspectives.

I want most a true friend. I dream of a true friend who finds enough mutual passion and perspective to share the falling in love experience that never ends. I can be realistic when I am awake, though I sometimes dream when I am awake too.

I may write more at some other time. I usually do. As much as I love words, I play with them too much to really trust them. We only begin to truly know each other when we leave the words behind.

If you are smiling right now, I may be looking for you :)



yeah, well, that'll separate the level heads from the messed up ones, now won't it? (also the old farts and the jailbaits)... what I hope I did was nudge away the unrealistic hopeless romantics and the desperate ones (housewives or not), not to mention the swingers... of course I probably nudged away everybody, but I have a bonus raffle for you as I actually browsed the few dozen people (and found maybe nine females) and wrote (and actually sent) a hello message to one (no response) and here it is now:

are we friends yet?

This is an awkward and distant way of meeting people, but then, maybe the distance makes it less awkward than other ways. As much as I love words, I do not want to become too comfortable sitting home alone sharing words on a screen with relative strangers.

I hope to find offline friends. I have two, a concert-going teenager who shares my passion for music and her couch-potato dad who encourages the vegetable in me. I'd like more variety as there are many other activities I enjoy that they are not into. Maybe you can relate.

I tease and joke a lot because I've been through a lot and the world is full of horrible pain and cruelty and I feel it too much to take it too seriously all the time. Sometimes my flip nature is misunderstood, but then, people who only look at the surface of things misunderstand a lot. I seek people who look deeper and my irreverence is a challenge to those who will.

I don't mind explaining myself to someone who really cares. I am serious when I say I am looking for friends. I was just kidding in the subject of this message :)

Whether you decide to respond, share a conversation or movie or concert or walk in a park or whatever, or not, I hope you and your son and all you love live long and wonderfully wonder-filled lives.

Make your fun meaningful and your seriousness fun.



so have I demonstrated effectively enough why I've been alone in this world for the last few years?... and please remember as you rush to leave your many comments that I am fragile and sensitive and vulnerable...

and I love you J






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

.

.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

.

.

.

.

AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




(EXPERIMENTAL PLAYTHINGS)
RSS?



who links here
blogwise
Blogarama
Globe of Blogs
blogthings

~ BLOGLINKERS ~




~ BLOGROLLING ~
(Blogroll RSS)


Blogroll Me!

published
blogadvance
blogazoo
blogexplosion
blogmad?
bloglines



(PREVIOUS TEMPORARY ATTRACTIONS)
TSUNAMI INFO
fantasy sports?
BLOGGIES?
sorry everybody
Orange Blossom Music Festival

Deland Music Festival
MIT Survey

brilliant idea
Celebrate Birthdays
FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
talking dog






SAY HELLO
407-325-1482





and if you want to leave
take good care
hope you make a lot
of true friends out there