LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

Candoor: Blogmad? It's better than ever! Get more visitors (or find me in chat there). Register now and tell me for extra credits. VARB?


JOIN OR RE-REGISTER NOW

welcome blogmadians... and the rest of you, while still in beta, you can still join the latest greatest party on the web, blogmad!

SUPPORT BLOGMAD! BUY STUFF



o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2004-08-03 - 3:09 p.m.

not a failure


what we have here, is hopefully not a failure to communicate (and what old movie do I have on my mind paraphrasing that line?), it is might be cheating to come up with an entry, but communication we can do, right?... I haven't been visiting anyone online lately and it's been a while since I left comments, I think... sometimes comments might reveal more about me than an entry cuz I am writing to someone personally (that reminds, me of the letters I've been meaning to make time to put up somewhere... sheesh, any wonder why an editor is high up on my wantlist? {aka wishlist, but then, it's not your typical merchandise-type wish list... I've still not gotten around to doing up one of those right for me}... but then, you might know all this already)... so for this entry I shall pull the comments I wrote today (I think it was today... the DLand server business, or is that more accurately busy-ness, has time mixed-up again) and give you an entry and you can tell me if you like it or if it makes sense or even, if you know, what it means...

and with that introduction, we now start the entry

this is an entry in three parts (not including the previous introduction and possibly with a coda)... it presents some thoughts left as comments in three different places (you know who you are) about my disappearances and moods and online behavior and long silences and the way my mind works, at least in a literary sense, and perhaps even the method of my madness... for all of you who know me through other sites, especially through sites I rarely visit these days...

Part One

I do not intentionally leave myself behind and yet, sometimes I may appear to forget myself in dark places... there is still much muck and mire to drag myself through (and still much cleansing left to do and still much joy in finding you and still knowing the light at the end of the tunnel may be a train and still believing it might not be coming to smash me but rather to pick me up and still waving cuz even if I'm gone so long I lost everything that was where I left off, there is hope somebody will wave back but I won't tell myself all this while I am dragging myself back through so I can feel it all again and remember what I do cuz that is how I get through to finally say thank you)...

Part Two

scary, sometimes (I may be to myself)...

I do not intentionally ignore the manna in the wilderness, to essense of life as I know it, the precious recognition you leave for me that is sustenance for my creative muses and (dare I admit it) the only real food my soul has to feed upon these days... and even as I reduce my defenses to rubble and expose all doubts and fears that ever were or could be to believe that I live in words and find in words the only salvation and peace and love and happiness and truth I've ever known in this life... and even as I thank you for ressurecting this... I smile from my self-imposed cross and bear no malice against the foolish choices that locked me in this mixed metaphor for it is the art I might someday call my life and with hope (and the wish of and for friends), some worth may be left behind...

until then, I thank you for being here... for caring... and for feeding me... and for putting up with all my rambling drama...

Part Three

I do not intentionally divide myself into compartments or different streams of consciousness... I was a little kid when I realized that I can see things from many perspectives and virtually anything is possible... it was instinctive to open my mind to possibilities and just as instinctive to understand that the easiest way to access myself, to get to know myself, to control myself, and to communicate all the different perspectives and aspects I know as me with me and with others... and when I found the darker sides of life, the sadness and pain, I decided that even though it is all part of a matrix that is my experience and me, I can forgive the bad feelings and those involved in creating them and leave a purity of good feeling within me untouched, intact, and the possibility of innocence in spite of experiences that most would claim takes or destroys innocence is alive and well for me in this life... and that's why I continued to refine my ability to create different worlds within my creative spaces for different moods and experiences, but I did not start out to intentionally divide myself into compartments or different streams of consciousness and I still don't think I do it consciously...

but then again, now that I know...

maybe I do...

ta da

and that concludes the entry composed of comments recently left in very special places that I don't frequent nearly enough but still leave my heart connected there and hopefully it is received and felt too... and beyond to you, dear readers, may my words mean something even when i am not sure if they do, for even when I am wandering aimlessly through my own doubts and foibles, I am sincerely caring and wishing I could show you more how deep my love goes... I'd buy a big house where we all could live and be saved by the music, ya know?...






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

.

.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

.

.

.

.

AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




(EXPERIMENTAL PLAYTHINGS)
RSS?



who links here
blogwise
Blogarama
Globe of Blogs
blogthings

~ BLOGLINKERS ~




~ BLOGROLLING ~
(Blogroll RSS)


Blogroll Me!

published
blogadvance
blogazoo
blogexplosion
blogmad?
bloglines



(PREVIOUS TEMPORARY ATTRACTIONS)
TSUNAMI INFO
fantasy sports?
BLOGGIES?
sorry everybody
Orange Blossom Music Festival

Deland Music Festival
MIT Survey

brilliant idea
Celebrate Birthdays
FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
talking dog






SAY HELLO
407-325-1482





and if you want to leave
take good care
hope you make a lot
of true friends out there