and I did make it to the gym yesterday, which is one of the best gifts I could give myself, but then I started writing elsewhere and then I nodded off and never made it back to write any more here cuz I woke just in time to go to work... a weekday workday birthday... I got a couple of voicemails... I didn't get to my PO Box, but I understand something is waiting for me there (shhh, don't tell me, it's a surprise)...

and at work they had a half a pizza, some fried chicken and sides, and a ice cream cake for the small band of us on our side of the hospital... night shift parties are kind of quiet anyway and unfortunately, the kids did not cooperate as three of them were on visuals due to crisis behaviors (always within view) which, on the night shift, is the equivalent of one-to-one so we couldn't sit together so we ate individually... on the plus side I got to read more of the book I've been carrying around for a few weeks (the third in Stephen King's Dark Tower series... I read the first one in a night or two and the second in a few days, but we've been talking a lot at night so I haven't had solitary reading time, which is ok, cuz the high school clique stuff they were playing wasn't good and it's better to be on speaking terms with people you work with all night in a psychiatric hospital, ya know?)...

the presents were very cool... the nurse said she owes me one, ok... you may remember her arrival and the changes that ensued... my two regular co-workers came through with very thoughtful presents... the Grease soundtrack (music, yes)... and a DVD-book about the history of TV with all sorts of stuff on it from Elvis' first appearance on Ed Sullivan to the Kennedy assassination to the moon walk to 9/11 and a whole lot more historic and fun stuff... it's called Stay Tuned - Television's Unforgettable Moments compiled by Joe Garner and has two DVDs with clips and interviews and behind the scenes stuff...

the irony of the title of this entry inspires laughter for me (in case you haven't figured out my sense of humor and perspective on life, love, the universe, and everything {including self-pity, politics, religion, and even painful rectal itch} is seriously tongue in cheek, occasionally bitten, almost always by accident, if accidents are to be believed in, that is)... and speaking of accidents of belief...

I wonder if the results of everything are random or predestined, chaos or order, fate or destiny or chance?... I wonder thise as I manage my fantasy sports teams... it is too early for baseball stats to be taken seriously, but down to the wire in basketball and my roommate and I are tied again... we went down to the wire in two football leagues last year and I think I won one and he won one, but I'm not sure (it's the game, not the winning or losing... it's most fun when we keep it close right to the last day/game)...

did I mention the TV went on?... why I didn't just go to bed is a question worth asking, especially since some DVD called Left Behind is the choice they made today... pitiful writing, a script full of holes and shallow scenes and bad acting, illogical characters making illogical decisions, but forgive them for they are preaching, after all... same old song (virtually word for word) and that, for me, is the reason I do not enjoy it, for it is like watching reruns, nothing new... fear of death, don't be afraid, it's not your fault, someone will save you... kind of Buffy for Christians, but then, I look at all fiction rather irreverently... and here I sit... probably cuz I felt like some socializing, some human contact, even if it is watching TV preaching... as I see it, it's all about fear and finding ways of dealing with it... some seem to use exclusion, some use displacing and projecting fear to attempt to conquer their fear...

seems to me that unconditional love should have no conditions...

but what do I know...

I wonder if, in the real world, would anyone who believes in a single spiritual goodness that encompasses all who have good intentions regardless of words they use, would it be condemned by all the existing religions that profess goodness and togetherness and yet to tend to divide people by teaching them to feel superior and to point fingers of guilt and negative judgments at each other?... ]

ah, but perhaps a better question might be... do all sheep really need to be lead?... now if I am struck down dead soon, will it be for asking questions that challenge accepted beliefs, for having a sense of humor about the hypocrisy and inconsistencies of human faiths, or will it be because I will be challenging the body in the morning to work out for a four consecutive day with less than four hours sleep tonight (and that number diminishes with each moment I sit in front of the TV rambling on)...

why do people fear nudity so much?...

no, I didn't have a party on the nudist beach, but it would have been nice... they did condemn Powder for staring at the bare-chested boy, but then they justified staring at Powder's genitals... so much hypocrisy, everywhere... only human, I suppose... tell the truth now, why do you watch girl's gymnastics?... and as my party winds down to the tunes of Don McLean and an old Ricky Nelson song, I bid you fond farewell...

some said Elvis the anti-christ when he gyrated on the Ed Sullivan Show...

and how do you view my irreverence?...

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)