ok, so there I was actually considering sleep (since I may have gotten six hours sleep in the past six days) when the knock on the door tells me that maintenance finally arrived to fix the

1. dishwasher
2. kitchen light fixture
3. bedroom air conditioning vent
4. fire extinguisher holder
5. laundry closet doors
6. front door closer thing
7. more stuff I forget

the dishwasher, which has not worked properly since we moved in several months ago, might actually work now as he replaced most every part including the pump and whole sprayer arm mechanism because, get this, they were broken... the other guys who came a few times since we moved in couldn't figure that out I guess... anyway, the maintenance guys are the best thing about this apartment community so I am not complaining... I'll leave that for the apartment review sites... I received an email from someone who read my review and she asked me to testify at her lawsuit against the management... I probably will not, since I have some empathy for what management has been through and also know they could retaliate in legal but uncomfortable ways like finding reasons to keep big chunks of my very big deposit and security, but the email was validation of sorts...

and then Rasputin twists my arm to check fantasy baseball because yet a few more superstar players are going on the disabled list and all the injuries are making the game much more challenging and time consuming... and then an email check tells me I've been a bad bad boy (as if I did not know this already) because I ignore email way too well (when the lucky email does get through the SPAM and junk filters) due to deep rooted psychological issues that probably pushes away most potential email friends before they form the bond required to actually understand me and put up with my nonsense... so I attempted to be clever and reconcilatory most sincerely because I really respect her and hope she'll understand my odd emailing ways...

not to mention my superficial (show me you love me by adding me to your favorites list, awww, c'mon, pretty please?)...

I guess maybe being cute and cuddly was a lot easier when I was a younger pup...

and true to myself and the fatigue I carry around, I nodded off as I was writing that email (and however brief {maybe an hour}, sweet sleep it was), but the phone woke me... it was Phil confirming passes for the music fest (anybody else want to come?... come on, it'll be a blast... you can have your own free campsite or share ours, just bring your own sleep gear and food and fun)... we'll be camping in the musicians area...

and on the website they recommend bringing: Misquote Repellant, Battery Powered Lighting, Generators, Table, Ant Killer, Ear Plugs (rooster crows are between 4AM-5AM), Fishing Poles)... I love the "misquote" repellant LOL...

so excitement bounced around my head keeping me away enough to check email again and I find confirmation from one beautiful person that she can make it for the weekend so I don't have to go up alone and be the solitary long haired freaky guru guy who shows up out of nowhere by himself and everybody wonders about... the more the merrier, so please invite yourself along (call me at 407-325-1482 or call Phil via the website) for a day or weekend if you've got some time May 20-22... hey, ya never know...

and it suddenly got so very dark outside that I had to turn the lights on... wow, major clouds and rain and booms.. Spring is finally here (rather later this year)... I love storms...

now if I can find the one working brain cell still wandering around my head, I'll drag myself off to bed and sleep in heavenly sleep, or is that peace... both, preferably... all I need to do is find the unwind button... maybe if I just lay down... zzzzzzzzzz...

until I return, here's some stuff that fell out of my head in the last few days and did not have a place to go:

and then there was something I read that inspired the following note and accompanying tribute following the quote:

to love and be loved takes on a whole new meaning after one learns to love one's self... need becomes desire (and distinctly different)... hunger becomes passion and dependancy becomes sharing... to actualize the reality of this life, being alone in separate bodies, being at peace and loving the experience... then sharing love can finally begin...

"Life just seems to be
a bunch of startings over." jnickole

jnickole was a very old soul
and a very old soul indeed
j called for a pipe
nic called for the roll
kole called for the mind so freed

it was quite a trick
to find ole jnick
you had to know just where to look

some searched high and low
some went down to the show
but ole jnick just lived in a book

there's probably more to all this floating around somewhere between my ears and who knows, there may be whole epic poems written elsewhere, but for now I wish you all peace and understanding (especially if you are sincerely trying to understand me) and appreciation far beyond these words can offer...

thank you for wanting to know me in any way shape or form... and to the current 58 of you who deem me a favorite (remember, your profile matters to me and an update is definitely due) here at Dland, bless you for the recognition and public appreciation and opportunity to connect with others that you provide for me... and to the few who email and call, your tolerance for my quirks, your patience with my delays, and your understanding of my maze and distractions (and you know who you are) is the wonderously wonderfilled wonder of the internet and you... someday I hope to have the means to thank you all as I would like to... until then, know you are blessed and loved every day...

. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)