LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

Candoor: Blogmad? It's better than ever! Get more visitors (or find me in chat there). Register now and tell me for extra credits. VARB?


JOIN OR RE-REGISTER NOW

welcome blogmadians... and the rest of you, while still in beta, you can still join the latest greatest party on the web, blogmad!

SUPPORT BLOGMAD! BUY STUFF



o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2005-02-17 - 6:03 p.m.

eighteen miles high


well, the last entry's been up all day and if you missed it, that's just our luck and only shows to go ya... or just... you could look back at it, it's still there... more amazing entries are lost and never read that way... alas, mourning comes early... in any case, we're into a new entry now, quite floating in a tin can, too...

of course I probably should not be so impulsive, I mean, to just fall in love at the drop of a link like I do... click click, and I'm hooked, without explanation or logical reasoning, just a feeling I get when i look to the west, or something like that... it is astounding how my instincts let me believe in a total stranger based on a few thousand words... sometimes even just a few hundred... and every now and then, just a few... no reason at all, I tell you, just this feeling that sort of feels like slipping into a bowl of warm jello after rolling through snow for hours or even diving into a large barrel of soft serve ice cream after running a marathon on a summer day... pudding, chocolate pudding... the music of the night... irresistible seduction unexplainable attraction unbelievable hunger and then, laughter... wonderful communion... it's that magical bonding between two people when trust blossoms into a believable understanding and two people can honestly relate to each other laughing and mutually feeling, "fuck'em if they can't take a joke" even if, because we leap into that trust so suddenly and completely, the joke is on us... if that just increases the laughter and all is forgiven and the bonding is all the better...

oh, if you'd only believe like I believe, we'd get by...

the saddest feeling of all is the sudden rejection by someone who was, up until that moment, fawning and bubbling over with enthusiasm and expressions of belief in the heart and mind and soul and that person convinces you that they care about you and have the patience to put up with your doubts and prove how much the care and believe in you and just when you start believing them, they find something you did or said to drop you like a hot potato and just like that, disappear, never to sparkle with any sort of caring or attention again... I see people do that to each other a lot and when it happens to me, it reinforces my doubts about believing people who put on a great show of loving and caring and having a wonderful heart and convincing everyone, from a distance at least, that they are supportive and beautiful people...

our mailboxes and message places are full of them... asparagus too, and cabbage... lots of cabbage... the mistake is making the mistake, or something like that... when you realize that what is real is what you know over time, space, and a good lasagna, then you'll be fine... really, you must know that you can only know what you know and even then, you can only be as sure as you really want to be and the trouble with that is you can change your mind and suddenly, everything you know is wrong (but don't go quoting Firesign Theatre just yet)...

maybe I must come to the conclusion that people who know how to throw up walls suddenly can not be trusted, just so I don't go thinking that nobody can be trusted... or maybe I'll just keep doing what I do, which is take each person as they come and believe what I see... after all, I am entitled to fool myself just as much as they are... I just don't blame anyone but myself when I am disappointed... that's the difference between accepting the illusions we live as the illusions they are and demanding others conform or die... ah, when I think of all the good people who, at least in their minds, have sent me to some horrible place they call hell, I must wonder how many different ways there are to define the word and concept we call good...

meanwhile, between the giggles and guffaws and coming back to the point as if there was one, we already know what a sucker I am for a beautiful face, but dam dam dam dam dam (how many are there, anyway?... in the song, I mean... you know, when he's become accustomed to her face?... oh, the sheer irreverence of the seriousness of the absurdity of the juxtaposition of the conceptualizations of the references and whomever might follow any)... and I don't mean typical cultural stereotype beauty either (oh really?... what were we talking about, anyway?), I mean personal history heavily influenced by what my first true love looked like type beauty (oh, yes, a mystery... or even amy... huh?), but over the years online, sometimes I don't even have to see a face to fall obsessively in love with some image I have in my head of what a beautiful heart and soul and mind, above all else what a beautifully free and creative and insightfully intelligent mind that particular someone who is putting some words online might have...

of course I know it is all illusion, word.

what was that about a joke?... if I bite, the hardest bite is always reserved for me... when I appear confrontation, I am confronting myself... if you personalize my words, that is your choice, but if you find any negative energy aimed at you in my words, it is your illusion for there is no negative energy aimed at you in any of my words... when I demand logic or reason or hard cold reality, it is of me I demand it... when I state my truth, it is for me first... if that offends you, ask yourself why, for only you know (and if you are pointing in any other direction, including mine, you are looking for your answers in the wrong place)...

everything is illusion, read more Richard Bach...

try some James Redfield... some Samuel Beckett... some Jean-Paul Sartre, perhaps... even Nietzsche... Kafka?... Kierkegaard?... and how existential can your mind perceive?... can you live?... and if you get the joke, move on to Robert Heinlein... and for a good time, try Douglas Adams... or take a walk with Neil Gaimen... listen to the words of every Pink Floyd song... and maybe Radiohead... cross Green Day with Oasis and get Madonna (testing your imagination, perhaps?)... have you ever stopped laughing and taken George Carlin seriously?... or Lenny Bruce? (what joke?... was there a joke?... is it madness when you are laughing alone and still enjoying the sound of your own laughter?)... what if Alice Cooper and Frank Zappa were the aborted brothers of Roger, Peter, and John's (The Who) Tommy?... would that prove anything? (come on, where is your mind?... have you lost your imagination?)... and if you really heard the words Metallica screamed before you went deaf, you might understand why heavy metal is called heavy... not always, but not never either... just because it's angry, that doesn't mean it's a waste of time... or bad for you, even... and raindrops on roses... it is highly probably that half of everything Robin Williams says goes over half the heads listening and the other half goes over the other half... and if John Lennon and Kurt Cobain wrote a song, what would it sound like?... come down to ground zero with Carl Sagan and Charles Dickens and Harry Chapin and Jackson Browne...

most everyone I've ever met is looking for the way out, while I am looking for the way in... usually, we find what we are looking for... the sad joke is that most people seem to fool themselves into believing they want to trust and love and get to know the real you, but for whatever reason they don't get there... most of the time I think that is because they do not have the patience or courage to accept that most of the journey is through the unknown and it is easier to jump to conclusions, accept assuptions, and settle on believing in a trust that is not really based on knowing... the usual outcome there disappointment... that's the way out built into the way... as opposed to remaining open and honest...

did somebody say something about a roller coaster?...

and if you understood every undertanding I understood in every reference and everything I've read and written, you still would only scratch the surface of understanding me, for I have not gone much deeper than that myself... everything is relative, with or without a formula to prove it...

faith does not have to be ignorant, faith does not have to be blind, faith can be full of knowledge, real empirical knowledge, knowledge that does not need to be beyond our grasp... if you dare open your mind to the infinite possibilities and do not get trapped in one exclusive thought pattern, you give yourself the best chance we can have in this life...

space travel is for philosophers, all that room to think...






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

.

.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

.

.

.

.

AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




(EXPERIMENTAL PLAYTHINGS)
RSS?



who links here
blogwise
Blogarama
Globe of Blogs
blogthings

~ BLOGLINKERS ~




~ BLOGROLLING ~
(Blogroll RSS)


Blogroll Me!

published
blogadvance
blogazoo
blogexplosion
blogmad?
bloglines



(PREVIOUS TEMPORARY ATTRACTIONS)
TSUNAMI INFO
fantasy sports?
BLOGGIES?
sorry everybody
Orange Blossom Music Festival

Deland Music Festival
MIT Survey

brilliant idea
Celebrate Birthdays
FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
talking dog






SAY HELLO
407-325-1482





and if you want to leave
take good care
hope you make a lot
of true friends out there