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2006-02-12 - 4:43 p.m. thoughts on masks, fat, and celebrations I know I was supposed to tell you about yesterday's road trip to we Wicked this morning, but I seem to have gotten distracted by much more important and serious and real-world ponderings, thanks to a dear favorite Dlander and phone friend, and so this entry (which may be considered a sermon since it's that time of the week for many of you, but only it that helps you take it more seriously so you might learn from it and not if that detracts from it right from the start because you don't respect me enough to consider my words worth reading as holy text... too late?... well, some of us will laugh anyway and still take it quite seriously and that's what counts, naa naa na na na nyuk nyuk nyuk), is based on my personal experience and boldly states what I believe and what I know as a fact of life for me as the fact of life that it is... hope you don't disagree, cuz you'd be wrong... that oughta turn off the naysayers, aye? yeah, well, sometimes I'd prefer if only friends stuck around... and anyone who keeps an open mind and sees through ego's teasing to the serious thought (and information) and sticks around to care can be a friend, but that's your choice to make and I'm gonna just keep rambling anyway... the difference you make is whether I am rambling alone and lonely or rambling with the feeling that friends are listening... that makes you special, valued, friends... and this seems to have (once again I start an entry with an afterthought) turned into one of my know-it-all entries... so skip it if you don't believe I know-it-all (or more seriously, if you do not believe I know what is right for me and are not open to the possibility that I might know something about life and living in these fleshy shells that is worth knowing)... all ego aside (and we know how much we love my ego, right?... not to mention the innuendos it inspires... thanks especially to Pfirsich for stroking it just right), saucy vixen that you are... but seriously, I've been alive forever (wait, that's a Barry Manilow song... serves me right for starting a paragraph with but seriously... anyway, think about this entry)... this entry contains some of what I learned so far... the following was inspired by the last dozen or two entries by my dear Ariza (locked) one part of that exalted stratums of persons who pick up the phone once in a while to remind me that the real world is out there, not just here in my mind and in the limited life cycle I live every day... especially during these days when I myself don't touch the phone unless it rings, to be tangibly reminded that there are those in the world who actually do care, that is an essential cure for whatever ails me and reason to continue living, writing, and being... have I conveyed reverent importance?... I hope so... more than even the personal benefit she gives me, the writing she offers provides fuel for thought for me and insight into the steps I've already taken many times in this life... fresh perspective is essential to continued improvement and hope and mental health and I am better for knowing and reading her... she does not get linked here often because she needs to keep her diary locked and I don't want to put you, dear readers, through the frustration of clicking on a locked link, but if you leave a note she may let you in... for the moment, I am happy she helped me ponder these next three thoughts... so begin we are all at crossroads every moment of life, it is just seldom more evident than at that point in life when stepping out on our own is eminent than that first time leaving our parents nest, for at no other point is more likely to actually happen (the choice to do nothing, make no changes, accept what is and leave it - is easier to accept at later points, once we fall into an relatively stable independent pattern in life in the physical world)... think about fat (this I do not only believe, this I know): body image (appearance) and body weight (condition) are two very different things... the first is superficial, external, and too easily influenced by meaningless information and subconscious insecurities... the latter is vital to continued good health... about me about celebrations (and being on time for them): if you know me, then you know I do not remember the last time I was on time for a birthday, anniversary, or specific holiday celebration... there are a few reasons (and I offer no excuses and rarely apologize, for my heart has no malice or harm in it and those who care understand and those who do not care would not benefit or believe anyway) for this pattern (and it has become an unconscious habit, for sure)... fin well, I can thank my dear Ariza (as I said, locked for the moment, but leave a note if you care and maybe you'll get in) for inspiring these thoughts (what started as a comment to her has turned into an entry)... I'll still be back to complete the previous entry (though that may have to wait until later or tomorrow or... yeah, who knows... in any case, there's another entry or two being scribbled this weekend and maybe tomorrow, stay tuned... and thanks...
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