LIFE

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( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
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ONE. . . WHY
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MEANING OF LIFE
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(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

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FAT MAN WALKING
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last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
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are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

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REFERENCE LIBRARIES

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AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
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the guide
purple
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maximum awesome
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something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
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CULTURE

the superficial
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urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2007-02-05 - 4:13 a.m.

the heart of the matter


well, I suppose that this kinda sorta definitively proves that I am the own worst enemy of my desire to share in how I allow my brain to pour out as I do and of late, even more radically in sudden binges as opposed to a constant flow (giving you, dear readers, the opportunity to forget your habit of coming to visit or to have a choice between drowning in words on a daily basis or drowning in words on a semi-monthly basis), but then, why should my mind and the writer be any less me (and challenging to get close to) than libido and the body or ego and the heart or cosmos and the anima or the holy writ and the spirit of ka ka...

who said "what?"...

come on, somebody out there must have said what?... not only do the odds of probability that anything is possible demand it, but the fact that most of you are silenced by my literary madness (except those of you who have something to say, but then, you know I'm just messing with minds and daring those who don't get it to misunderstand and show their true colors {shining through} not completely unlike Simon challenges PC in a rather different way for his probably rather different purposes, but that's neither here nor there {well, it might be there but it's definitely not here) because following even this overly simplified and dramatically abbreviated babble probably shots past the top of more heads than combs and brushes, but that's beside the point (unless you get the point), so nevermind...

the fact is (where there might be facts, assuming such things are possible, with enough faith, I suppose), this entry is presented to represent the reason for the proof mentioned in the first thought of this entry, but as usual I will not simply lay it out for you to easily see because if I did that I'd never know if you truly understood or if you simply faked it because you had enough information to fake it well (which is also why I am not letting anyone know I am Elvis or Don Juan or a multi-billionaire) so I can be sure that when the one finally does arrive I am not tied up with some convenient compromise as I may have made that mistake before and would rather not do that again (and I don't just mean Toronto-type) so if you are struggling to follow along I wish you could know how much I appreciate you...

for most shall not...

for if you blink around here, you might miss a dozen (or 22) entries or more and never know the brilliant madness (or sheer waste of time) that you might have witnessed (or participated in, even) had you not blinked (or checked in more often and had hours {or days} to read and follow links and read more and cross reference and annotate and combine and create your own understanding)... a shame, isn't it?... well, I suppose that might depend on whether you believe (or do not believe) if there' is an isn't, doesn't it?...

doesn't?...

hmmmm...


well, if you can stop mentally masturbating to your favorite TV personality (or wherever you find your libido fantasy image in your mind) long enough to compound your misunderstanding of the words by reading on a bit further, you may find a brief synopsis of the 22 entries that appeared just days ago right before your eyes while you weren't looking...

not to be confused with rap of the variety of self-aggrandizing ego-promoting narcissism that most might spout in rhyme cuz that's considered so cool by the masses of insecure followers who constantly look for someone else they can worship to fill the void where their own ego and identity ought to be...

huh?...

forget the Titans, remember the Talmud!



and stop sitting there all doe-eyed as if I said something you didn't understand because you really should make it that obvious, especially not when you're reading this in a library or other public place... and don't forget to step back when the computer starts smoking...

did you just get up and look around at the back of the computer or monitor?...

creep, I may be, but a svelte sexy creep if you know what I mean... and if you don't well, then you just don't know and far be it for me to enlighten you (or turn you on, for that matter)... go back to watching the Dresden Files and imagining Harry Potter grew up and is sending secret messages out over the airwaves just for you... yes, just for you... I get my own messages from Hermione through other channels, thank you...

save the cheerleader and save the world!...

but how do you stop an exploding man?



42, 24, 23, 22, 17, 9...

number nine, number nine... she was always seventeen... five foot two, eyes of two... ask Jim Carrey about 23... and Donald Sutherland's son, Jack, about 24... and the computer the mice built about 42... as for me, if those numbers win the lottery tonight I'll sure be sad I didn't play them... and laughing at myself as usual, or more than usual, actually... but I gave you the answer, so you can tell the wind it can rest now... let something else blow you for a change...

what about Bob?...

oh no, not another quixotic crusade looming on the horizon... what replaces masturbation for the teenage mind when the hormones slow down might have always fascinated the female of the species (who is known to be more in tune with everything, though less apt to show it for being less in tune with the egocentric hunger to express identity and spread her seed as far and wide as possible)... possibly... I mean, that was possibly a question, probably if you look at it with strict grammatical acuity, but then, they are your eyes, after all, so who am I to tell you what you see or do not see?... or what is or isn't... see?...

don't you wish your life was a non-stop celluloid movie-show?...

only when I laugh... or cry... or want to watch...



you just wouldn't understand if you are not at least part voyeur... and if you think you are not, well, tell me again the next time you drive by a serious car accident or see a wardrobe malfunction on TV or running down your street, even... really, your neighbor is the epitome of what you consider sexy and innocently changes in front of a window that faces your yard and you just happen to be fixing your roof and glance down into the window, what do you do?...

I hope you didn't fall too hard...

obviously I have rambled on a bit too long to present to you the synopsis of the previous 22 entries that would entice you to take a gander at them by clicking on the links that prominently title each paragraph that may or may not be inspired by or about the said 22 entries, so I shall venture into that venture (verb, noun, some words are so versatile, aren't they?) right here and now in this entry, so you'll just have so suck it up and deal with the feeling that I left you hanging out here naked for all the world to see (don't zip up too fast, you can get something caught that way... and even hair can hurt, ya know)... so tune in tomorrow and maybe you shall see what I meant to mean when I said what I meant to mean earlier in this entry...

here's a tiny taste:

poesiaga

dedicated to dedication to the word, I mean, not The Word as some might believe, and not even the words as in word. as some might represent, but the word as in the word as the expression of everything from what is to an absence of what is (and whether that would be what isn't or simply a void for there is no isn't {following this logic of faith as some might profess with or without following the same logic to the conclusion of undoing [or hammer, though whether it was Thor's or of different origin is still up for debate, not to alter it's shattering ability] as thought streams radiate outward in infinite directions [which is slightly different than every direction, but you might need to study a bit of quantum mechanics and the next level to go there, even in this parenthetic aside] within a parenthetic aside} within this parenthetic aside, or anywhere for that matter) obviously not a straight line, though it might be a hammer, regardless of shape or direction...

kapish?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


well, you will just have to read for yourself (with your own eyes and mind, ya know?) to gather whatever wits you've got for further understanding, or comprehension, even... what I will offer you as a consolation in conclusion here within is my heart in a box, a representation of love for you for caring enough to not only come here to check on me, but to stick around long enough to reach this place on this page on your computer screen for it is here, right here where you can put your finger and feel the appreciation and wonder I feel just because you are right her reading my outpouring of love for you... go ahead, touch my heart...







J








. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


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the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

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