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CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
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last---past---next---now



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(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

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common dreams
the progressive
mediate
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(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

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PO BOX 780398
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send me some music
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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2005-02-18 - 6:51 p.m.

another daily life entry


in the past twelve or so hours the entries for the past two days were uploaded... many of you missed them, alas, so I can only hope you find the time and interest to fill in the missing pieces by back clicking... as usual, the week was busy and uploading paused and here we are... no work tonight, of course I should be sleeping, but it feels like time for a life in black and white entry (as opposed to my rambling nonsense entries, aye?)...

sitting up and waiting for Precious to call for pick up from a school trip (working nights with a teenager in the house is a sure way to get very little sleep, especially when that teenage is popular and into just about everything there is for a teenage to be into... well, we hope not everything, but sheesh she's a busy kid)... what else is there to do than write an entry...

so is ketchup your favorite condement too?... I love condiments, the smell of a good smokey barbecue sauce can have me drooling from miles away... and I love all sorts of sauces... but I definitely use ketchup on more things than anything else... I buy it by the case... that's just in case you wanted to know...

believe it or not, they are still banging on the walls around here... the hurricane repairs have been going on four to five days a week (sometimes more) for months... working nights, that leaves very inconsistent sleeping hours... that makes everything more shallenging, raises the stress levels, and is why I've had a couple or few cold or flu bugs take hold these last few months which is more (at least I think it is) than I usually get in a year or few... couple the constant construction zone with my roommies cleaning habits and I have not had a guest over here in more than a year... horrible way to run a social life, aye?...

all wonderful excuses, but I could always move... or just invite strangers over to the messy construction zone... or something... the bottom line is I've not been in a personally social mode in a long time... and people seem to respond very well to that in that they stay away... I am easily rejectable (like a used razor?... I hope not... maybe the analogy is not too harsh after all... come on now, don't all reassure me at once now... laughter is sooo inappropriate here... yea, I know)...

looking around the space, I see semi=unpacked boxes everywhere... Precious's new computer boxes still take up half the living room... Raspy put together his old wooden kitchen table and that sits in the dining room space just as you walk in the door to the apartment... the big green chair is still plopped kind of awkwardly half in the dining room and mostly in the walkway between the entrance and the living room, basically because it was the last thing the movers brought over and no one was in any mood to rearrange furniture... may never be, around here...

and my room is a wreck since I tore through every box to find the software and modem and other stuff Precious needed for her new computer when Raspy had that impulse to buy it... we've been encouraging him to get her one since she moved in with us, but he waited until the move and everything was packed up in boxes to finally do it... so the computer stuff that was sitting neatly next to the computer was in who-knew-which-box because the packing was rushed because we were given no notice by the apartment management who were paying for the move...

so I've got irregular stacks (very much Seussian in their appearance and ability to deny gravity) of semi-unpacked boxes and stuff, leaving narrow crooked paths between the doorway and the cloest and the bed and the bathroom and the window... the kid in me must still love it, but my toes are kinda wary...

the kitchen is a little cleaner than it usually is and I keep hoping it won't fall back into the stanky conditions that were the norm in the old apartment... I still refuse to be the maid, cuz that won't teach them anything and will irritate me, since cleaning kitchens is not my favorite pasttime which is why I cook as clean in one activity... Raspy seems to be doing a lot better, but Precious seems to be oblivious to the messes she makes and leaves... seems like she's going to need a maid or a partner who likes to clean up after her to have a happy relationship and healthy home...

Precious just called from the bus... they are just leaving Tampa, which makes them about two hours late... sounded like they were having a great time... massive sugar-highs all over the bus, apparently... seems to be an everyday thing for kids today... sugar and caffeine from morning to bed... just like their parents... if anyone really wanted to wipe out the United States, all they'd have to do is poison the coffee and sugar imported into this country... or, if they could afford it, just stop sending the coffe and sugar and other drugs and watch the people implode... it's sad to think it would be that easy to do it, but have you ever seen anyone try to go cold turkey on caffeine?...

even a once a week binge is a lot and I've been averaging that since Precious and Raspy moved in... of course working nights and getting very inconsistent sleep and being physically tired a lot and does not help the will power... anyway, tonight is a wash out for any sort of social life... unless, of course, somebody wants to come over and curl up with me while sleep the sleep of the dead... what are friends for, after all...

this is your everyday entry... life in black and white... absent is the on again off again, especially of late, philosophizing and meanderings through cliches and and obscure references that have secret meanings for any one who might understand and the very few who ask for everything and have the patience and stamina and proximity to get it... so much fun, it's almost as good as sharing...

for it is for one alone that everything is done...

and all the rest of us can make of it what we wish, as we wish, hopefully making of it something worthwhile and positive, but then, it is as you wish, your choice...

the briefest statements are so often overlooked...

and there's the phone again, I nodded off as I was waiting (and typing)... it is, after all, many hours past my bedtime... it was Precious and her busload of fun letting me know they are still at least a half hour away, but the teachers don't want to gave to wait at the school so all rides should be waiting at the school when the buss arrives... gotta wonder what sort of idiot is in charge of this particular school outing... I mean, they were scheduled back almost two hours ago and plenty of people were probably waiting at the school back then... maybe they're still waiting, nodding off in their cars or worried cuz their kid does not have a cell phone...

but the idiot part is for the person to tell the kids with cell phones to call home hours before they are at the school to demand parents be at the school waiting... since they are unbelievably late and still have no accurate estimated time of arrival but still want parents to just wait in theircars outside of school for hours, they earn the title of idiot...

I did not ask to speak to the idiot... I told Precious I'd be at the school in a half hour and hopefully the bus would not be too late after that, so I'll pause here and wash up a bit and head out there...

. . .

and we are back... darkness had fallen and it was a good dark crispy-air evening... a few dozen cars were sitting in the parking lot, most running because the air tempertures dropped into the turn on the heater range, or maybe they wanted music and didn't want to waster their batteries... so there was heat and music and light and lots of cars and people and clouds of toxic fumes in the parking lot of the school, but no sign of the buses...

I called Precious to confirm which parking lot they were going to be dropping off at and she wasn't sure, so I told her that there were cars in three of the four main parking lots and the front entrance lot looked like the one where the bus needed to be... she said she'd relate that to the idiot... and they were still about a half hour away...

finally, about three hours after their scheduled return time, the buses arrived and sure enough they dropped the kids off in an area where there is no parking so the kids had to walk to whatever parking lot they thought their parents might have chosen... so much for the idiot not leaving the kids unattended... the safety of cell phones guided precious right to my car and she bubbled over obviously having way too much fun to mention the fact that I should be sleeping so I didn't and listened and smiled...

and now we're home and it is time for bed... so I shall navigate the Seussian piles of boxes and fall over and sleep until I wake... that's one of the best parts of a day off, sleeping in a world where alarm clocks do not exist...

and this is the life in black and white, much less exciting that the rambling nonsense I put together from strange parts of my brain that have little or no contact with anything normal people might consider cohesive thought and only if you can find and follow the threads of obscure references might you understand some of what might have been on or passing through my mind at the time (and bless you for that)...

thank you for spending this time here with me... it's been fun... hope your life is even more full of love and fun than ours is here...






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