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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-05-21 - 1:29 p.m.

blog #16


I want to love like I used to love
but nobody comes that near
and how can I love like I used to love
when nobody is here

well, I might be losing my mind... but that wouldn't matter much if I was already out if it, right?...

yes, we can pause to reflect on that question, go ahead...

hopefully nobody left their mouths open long enough for flies to get in and slap my ego silly for becoming so flippant and enjoying the self-indulgence I just gave myself, but in any case I have progressed from momentary lark to second day adventure tour at the The Onion as I expanded my personal ad these and even started a blog...

yes, you read write, I started a blog at The Onion Personals... it's all her fault, really... well, and his too, if I am to explore this matter further... besides, he's an old wise man from the blogspot tribe and she's not a typical girl..

see I was just doing some housework around my world and decided I was neglecting my RealTime� blog, what with my ambivalence to actually continue there and lack of time to explore the other two places I might start up a functional RealTime� blog, so I clicked over to it and wrote a post...

of course it was supposed to be a brief post, but then, I hadn't written here behind the candoor today so I had all these words bursting at the seams and the brief update of where I am and what I'm doing got a bit out of hand...

that's where Morris comes in... see, he was kind enough to actually leave me a comment there and his comment was a hammer on the nail head kind of astute observation of my current situation, to understate it rather dramatically... he said:

"It sounds like you could use a girlfriend!

now he doesn't run an advice column for nothing, aye?... so with his profound revelation in mind, I mentioned that post over there that I had actually coincidentally just impulsively and quite unexpectedly put a brief personal ad up on the web at The Onion and that lead to me clicking over to The Onion to check on the personal ad link and there I was, all personal added to the web and I noticed I had a bunch of "prefer not to say" answers (and I thought I answered all their questions)...

so I clicked and found some more questions to answer... and then I clicked some more and found more questions to answer... it was like being on my own website, clicking and clicking and finding more and more layers (layers ate The Onion, oh mergatroid) to answer more and more questions and finally, thinking I was done, I noticed a link called "blog"...

you know I just had to click there, right?...

and I see that The Onion has blogs attached to personal ads and I'm pondering the possibilities and scoffing at the probabilities and decide to click on one of the features blogs to see what someone might do with a personal ad blog at The Onion (and besides, she's really adorable... hush Smash, I am not that predictable... candora may be, but... get out of my head, will ya) and lo and behold (a sight befell my eyes) there were quite promising words behind those pursed lips (I did not call them irresistible, that was a figment of your imagination... or mine, maybe, but anyway) and I was inspired to take on the challenge to write a blog post for a personal ad site...

see, it was their fault, they made me do it...

you know what a sucker I am for good insight, passionate prose, and a pretty face...

and the girl isn't bad looking either...

rim shot...

yeah, well, it must be serious cuz I've gone as far as finding the one and only picture I have of myself (the one taken by surprise just as I was waking up from an impromptu nap in the big green chair and caught stretching), so stay tuned to find out if the love of my life come from The Onion or if I'll just walk away with more tears...

so many layers in that, ya know?...

what's that?... you want the rest of the answers I gave to The Onion posted right here in this entry? (that mocking though about cleared out two thirds of the readers I bet)... well, I could save you to arduous task of searching for me over in The Onion personals (have I plugged them enough yet to deserve to be able to plug behind the candoor there?... I'm not sure, but I'll try eventually cuz what's the point of building an empire on the web if I can't tell people about it, especially when someone might actually want to know me...

well, before we get to the questions and answers (you'll be disappointed.. I was uncharacteristically brief... but then, perhaps I will expound on them at some future time if you really want me to), the good people at The Onion gave me a Mini-Meyers-Briggs test and I took it twice (as I always do with any online tests) and came up with two different results with equally honest answers to the questions, as usual)... so for the moment I was:

Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judger (INFJ) "The Mystic Writer"

and then I changed just two answers ever so slightly on the second time and I became:

Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Judger (ENFJ) "The Growth Teacher"

and over the course of taking Meyers-Briggs tests for years, I've tabulated the following results for the various categories that I tend to drop into most (I present those that I've dropped into more than 80% of the time for your reading pleasure and general knowledge of what Meyers and Briggs think of me:

86% Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Judger (ENFJ) "The Growth Teacher"
85% Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judger (INFJ) "The Mystic Writer"
83% Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiver (ENFP)
"The Social Philosopher"
80% Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiver (INFP)
"The Idealistic Philosopher"

the "Thinking" ones fall into the 70 and 60% range, which is still pretty darn high, considering, but I suppose it is fair to say I am a fairly stable NF (Intuitive Feeler)... yes, I intuitively feel my way around whenever I can get away with it...

so anyway, here are the results of the questions you've been dying to get your hands on (cuz you like to feel things too, right?):

The word or phrase that best describes my personality

fun, honest, innocent, curious, empathic, ethical, intense, energetic, playful, helpful, loving, loyal, reliable, irreverent, enigmatic, sensual, incorrigible, emotional, professional, flexible, spontaneous, sensitive, insatiable, oh, there's a Johari Window link on my daily diary/blog website at diaryland where lots of people have chosen words that describe me :)

I'll be brief in my answers from now on (well, I'll try, just to prove I can)... I ramble on a lot (I love to write) and if you want to know more, just read my many web pages or ask...

The best or worst lie I've ever told

I never lie...

Fill in the blank: _____ is sexy; _____ is sexier.

intelligent laughter is sexy, healthy fitness and an open mind is sexier...

My most humbling moment

when my best wasn't good enough (long story)... and my work keeps me humble...

HEADING: Ideals

If I could be anywhere right now

I'd be in love with someone in love with me...

If I had a million dollars

I would think of more specific ways I would enjoy spending it...

HEADING: Philosophies

Five items I can't live without

air, water, food, shelter, love...

25 years from now, I see myself

enjoying life as I do now...

The role religion plays in my life

for me, organized religion is usually a nuisance I avoid whenever possible...

My personal motto or creed

honesty without harm

HEADING: Style

My personal style

casual, comfortable, and adaptable to changing situations and environments...

The celebrity I resemble the most

you tell me...

Body art

none...

Favorite item of clothing

none...

HEADING: Space

In my bedroom one will find...

a bed (I spend little time in there when I don't have a partner)...

In my refrigerator one will find...

varied foods and drinks...

Pets

none, though I love animals...

HEADING: Work & Living Environment

The pace of my life is best described as:

varied, flexible, comfortable...

What I like - or dislike - about what I do for a living

like: helping others

dislike: pay cut I took moving south, administrative incompetence...

The type of family I come from

I was adopted, barely have any contact... would have liked it to be different, but I didn't a vote...

The amount of fame and fortune I've achieved in my life is...

enough for me...

HEADING: Interests

My favorite way to spend a weekend

sharing music, arts, exercise, cooking, eating, writing, reading, making love, relaxing, exploring new things, and experiencing each moment with someone who enjoys life as much as I do...

If I could take a class on any subject, it would be...

I can take a class on any subject and I'd let my partner choose...

The sports I play, and the sports I watch

I don't play as much as I'd like to these days... I love to run... I'd like to play more tennis, softball, football, basketball, and others... I listen to and glance up at various sports, but seldom watch much of anything for long unless I am with someone who shares the experience...

My most unusual or impressive skill

that is for others to decide...

HEADING: Entertainment

The last great book I read

"Time Enough For Love" by Robert Heinlein

In my stereo right now, you'll find...

at cdstacks.diaryland.com you'll find my latest stack of CDs currently playing in my stereo...

5 albums I can't live without

I love music and luckily I've never had to make this decision and we can discuss it if you'd like...

The best movie I saw this year

this depends on my mood... I saw The DaVinci code last night and enjoyed it, but "best" changes too often to call one out here...

Movies which spend the most time in my DVD player

dozens... sharing the experience of watching a movie is a favorite activity and that sharing itself makes a movie a favorite... a few that come to mind at the moment are Hook, The Princess Bride, The Hitchhiker's Guide, Sleepless in Seattle (most Meg Ryan, Tom Hanks, and Robin Williams films), It's A Wonderful Life, Wizard of Oz, and so many more it's unfair to list these few... I love films that inspire wonder and enchantment, emotional catharsis, healthy romances, and enlightened thought...

Shows I Tivo (or would)?

I seldom watch TV unless someone else turns it on, so my roommate's preferences are 24 and House... I enjoy Sci-Fi shows but don't make a point to watch unless someone else wants to...

Favorite on-screen sex scene

don't have one, but I'd happily explore and choose one if you'd like...

HEADING: Dating

Activities I'd enjoy on a date

getting to know the person I am with... everything else is window dressing (hopefully fun, but just distractions from the point for me)... I enjoy most anything when I am enjoying being with someone...

A date should be planned

sometimes...

On a first date, I expect

nothing...

I hope for honesty, openness, and a relaxed positive attitude but above all else, I hope for realness...

and just so you don't feel left out, here's the first post from over there, the latest bog in the blogosphere now definitely cluttered with my blogs:

I have a blog for my romantic
I have a blog for my babbling fool
I have a blog for the pathos
I have a blog to release the cruel
I have a blog for more formal thinking
and a blog for the daily life
so many blogs for so many things
now a blog to find a wife?

seems just crazy enough to suit me
and if you can laugh along
then maybe this site won't boot me
and we can write a song

as if I don't already have enough places to put words online (and I'd have linked each one above, but I'm not sure if that's allowed, which is very restrictive for me as I love linking to layer my writing with depths and tangents and odd asides), I start a new blog here for however long it lasts (this personal ad thing is a lark for me... I have dozens around the web, created impulsively over the years in some fanciful moment of hope and idealism {or perhaps boredom}, and I seldom return to check on whether anything happened with them, but this is the first that I've noticed has a blog feature, so here we are)...

blogs can be habit forming for me...

I was encouraged (though she wouldn't know it unless she happens along to this post and if she does, well... hi *grin* and all) to open this blog by atypical_girl who appeared in the "watched blogs" box when I clicked on blogs here so I clicked to see what an onion blog might be like and after reading several of her posts (and loving her way with words) I decided to scratch some words of my own here...

I don't know what will come of this... the rhyme above is tongue-in-cheek (wife rhymes with life, don't sue me)... I am primarily looking for compatible friends so I don't have to do everything with my roommates (I mean they're cool, but they don't share many of my interests and I'd like to expand my social life)...

however, being a hopelessly hopeful romantic who lives to be in love, I am not opposed to falling in love if the friend happens to fall with me... mostly, in recent years, my falling in love is left for literary fantasy, creatively expressed in rhymes from afar (and I know the difference between my literary fantasies and an actual relationship, so please try not to mistake my online writings for serious proposals or any such assumed emotions in case you happen to inspire a love song along the way)...

I'll happily give you my phone number or other contact info if you want to ask serious questions about me as I love to share and have nothing to hide... and if someone with a compatible personality just happens to be in Orlando, FL and wants to hang out listening to music, watching movies, walking through parks, visiting museums, hanging in a cafe or on the beach or anywhere, then YAY! for onion personals :)

so hopefully this first posts gives you some idea of where I am coming from and what I am doing here... I've got about a million words online and millions more handwritten offline (I really ought to be the "Mystic Writer" Meyers-Briggs thing, but then, I can be any of a half dozen of those categories depending on my mood when I take that test and each time I am genuinely as honest as I can be)...

honesty, start and stay there or have fun somewhere else... that's something you ought to know about me... and I tend to write a lot... but though most of my words will be posted elsewhere, I just might come back a time or few to post some here as well... especially if a little encouragement pops up now and then :)

yes, I am out of my mind, but that's where the world can be found... I sit in my head all alone (except for the voices, but we'll leave them for another post... huh?... oh, ok, welcome to my irreverent humor, hope it doesn't scare ya, wink, wink, nudge, nudge) and am very comfortable in here with myself, but I love to share too so...

there's some clever twisted analogy in there somewhere but I've been awake some 36 hours and I'll leave it for you to put together (you can take credit for it if you like)... perhaps the best thing about being out of my mind is it leaves room for you to come on in...

welcome... make yourself at home... I'll be back any time now :)




PS... I also updated my CDstacks blog, so you can catch up on the soundtrack of the life in black and white... now can this weekend get any more exciting?...



I must sleep now...






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