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last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
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movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
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global news matrix
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reason
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nobody here




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the guide
purple
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something awful
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odd todd
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the superficial
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church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
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fark
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post secret
webby awards
meetup
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ragged trousered philosopher
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the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
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PO BOX 780398
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send me some music
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last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2005-08-10 - 9:50 p.m.

another work ramble


doing a double shift in the moddle of a week is no way to maintain healthy sleep patterns (or a positive attitude about balancing work and life)... so I feel kind grumbly because I've not slept enough and I've not written enough... being distracted by blogathon negativity (previous entry, hopefully it ends there... I am reminded why I have yet to actually google myself to find out what people are writing about me, which inspires a laugh at myself since ego would love to think there's a vast undersground movement to elect me most popular or god or something, but then, if you've been around my babblings before, you know how much fun I think it is to tease my massively insatiable ego... poor thing, it has such high aspirations... sort of like a cartoon character) doesn't help... so I've got a few minutes to blurt out whatever comes to the surface of my mind first (nearest the finger tips, I suppose, whether that is surface or something more akin to dropping the hand in a bucket of sand and sifting through to see whatever might stick) as my hair drip dries before I must dress and go to work...

so how are all my favorite internet peoples?...

that'd be you, dear readers (and some strangers who do not read me, but who lure me in with their clever writing styles... but then again, if they do not read me, then I suppose the question isn't particularly for them since it is here to be read where they do not read...

logic confounds the fairy-tale mind sometimes...

yeah, ok, I hope you are well and happy today... good health and in touch with your center and your truths (and may they never have to hide)...

around here, first at work (since that's where I've been mostly this week), there are lots of cold and flu-ish bugs running around... all sorts of symptoms greet me when I get there (work) and I've been doing my best to dodge the microbes even though I've been around them more than usual... so far I've got a handle on them and while it does take more energy to turn up the immune system (especially when pushing the body with caffiene on very little sleep), I'm surviving without symptoms so far... stubbornness and discipline, a dangerous combination for germs...

and being that I am working more (shifts other than my night shift), I am much more immersed in the drama (not just typical workplace drama, but the teenage dramas that got the kids locked in a psych words in the first place... yes, I meant wards... ain't typos grand?...

sometimes I feel like Harry Potter (maybe because everybody at work is reading the sixth book and those references are on my mind a lot) with a Marauder's Map of the psyche as I leave the place most days with the hope that mischief was managed... or is it mischeif...

if you focus on the spelling, you missed the deeper meaning to the typo... in face, since the subject of typos (and gramma) creeps out of it's little box in the closet of my head, I love typos because they so often can lead to linguistic amusements (and you oughta know how much I love linguistic amusements... and double entendres, for that matter, but that's a different color, horse or cow, or sheep or whatever barnyard critter it may be)... and accidental excursions into the pysche... yeah, that's a fact too...

my approach to the field of mental health is, at times, unorthodoxed, but then, I firmly believe in individuality and no book has been written about anyone unless the author knows that person before writing that book and even then, it's mostly guesswork and from the outside... your head is your head and only you can really know what's going on in there...

so at times I might empower the kids a bit more than my peers would like, but then, it's doubtful that anyone is going to be around to hold their hands and tell them what to do 24/7 after discharge (even if they move on to an adult psychiatric institution), so I thin it is best that they learn to fly on their own while they have the safety net of our little hospital...

ya thin?...

oh for goober's sack, be serious... ok, I'll try... it is much easier for staff to just run a regime, have everyone walk in straight lines, and repress individuality and thinking for self, but while that sort of military mind set may be fine for soldiers going to war, I do not think it's the way to get kids through their trauma and confusion and chemical imbalances so they can develop independent self-confidence and esteem and the wherewithall to survive this life out on their own in the real world...

hey look, a post about work that is not ranting about how poorly managed the place is... wow, could things be getting better there?...

not even a little...

but I don't need to vent about the madness of management regularly because it's their problem and I'm not there to manage staff mischief...

Precious just walked in... she appears to have just returned from school shopping with her best friend (Rasputin is asleep... so I'll play parent tonight since she is all excited about the stuff she bought and wants an audience)...

. . .

and we're back... I still get excited about school supplies (ah, the dork comes out... love your inner dork) and she's picked out lots of fun stuff... useful stuff too, but fun stuff is often useful stuff (except it costs a dollar or two more)... she's also on a water kick (sorta)... yes, you heard right, my darling Precious is trying to cut back on the Pepsi and eat better... I did say sorta...

there's some expensive water she's taken to liking... yes, water.. and yes, expensive, of course... gotta have a gimmick, a popular marketing campaign, or some such secret society connection... her and her friends found two waters they like, one because Josh (Groban) drinks it and one that has a ruler-scale line on the side of it that tells you what you'll be if you drink to that line... of course if you drink all the water you'll be a genius.. the real genius is the one who came up with that marketing strategy... but it's water and I'll be stomping it into Raspy's brain that he should invest all of his Pepsi money into that water that she'll actually drink...

he loves me, he can take a little head stomping...

so anyway, where were we?...

ah yes, managing mischief at work... the staffing situation is worse than ever, but I only focus on it when frustration with the deterioration of patient care reaches a point where I must stomp some ideas into some work heads... a few paragraphs (or long essay, even) generally releases all frustration and negativity absorbed (kinda like cleaning a filter) and I'm back to waking up reborn and being the happiest kid on the school bus...

negativity is everywhere, as is insecurity and all the psychobabble terms that actually do describe behavior (and it's the behavior that matters... the labels just make it easier for us to uget an idea of what the behavior actually appears to be) and the best we can do is filter through and seek the positivity that is somewhere in there... usually the smiles and frowns, the laughter and tears, the love and hostility are confused and interwoven together in behaviors and it is too easy to personalize what someone says or does and become defensive... what I always try to remember are a couple of tenets that keep me balanced...

"we see things not as they are, but as we are"

The Talmud

and

most every thought we have (and action we take) is much more reflective of who we are and what we feel than is is about other people or what others do... I so should explain that in more depth and detail but i so have to go to work so later maybe...

sometimes, it's either a matter of you get it or you do not get it... ultimately, the answers we need most come from inside... so when I feel frustrated, confused, defensive, angry, or find myself wanting to tell someone else what to do or where to get off, I always try to remember to ask myself why...

every time the answer has more to do with me, my life, my experiences, and what happened during my day (or lifetime) that I would rather put on someone else... if I am truly honest with myself, that is...

working too much also has be rambling on about self-help philosophies, huh?... well, Stuart Smalley did have a point, even if he was a parody of every self-help book and program ever created... and it's fun to ramble on and laugh at myself (like you didn't know that's mostly what I do here)... hopefully you come back because you like laughing with me at me (or cuz you find other amusements in the rambling tales of life in black and white and assorted philosophies)...

late for work is what I am now, so I'm gonna run out the door... I hope you love yourself amazingly tonight (in any way you want to) and find peaceful dreams will your slumbers... or otherwise enjoy the time between now and our next meeting like this...

we've got to keep meeting like this, ya know...

we might even be friends J






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
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