LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


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HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
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THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2008-12-23 - 12:27 a.m.

a(m)e=hhr(squared)


a(m)e=hhr

we'll get there... those of you who read this over at RealTime and think you know the score already have forgotten that this is the home of the babbler and it is only behind the candoor that the words flow with the least restriction or thought of what it might mean or how it or i might appear or how long it might take or whether the words will ever even get read or even if they are totally real or just figments of my imagination cuz here, (pause for dramatic effect) behind the candoor, (pause for a knowing smile) we reach the pinnacle of babbleosity and dance with the universal babble gods (figuratively speaking for the atheists among us), the energy of the eternal infinity that somehow (whatever the theory today) connects everything and makes sense out of nonsense and nonsense out of sense because, after all, there is the constant change rule and 42

so sit back, take a snooze, pull up your favorite beverage and snack and relax with me while the babbler does his thing with the previously written contemplative mostly deeply serious introspective philosophical bit of genius that might have been, had a genius actually wrote it

feel the love, it is all yours right now

three daily blogs? (three blind mice?)... no, actually, two daily blogs and a diary (two mice and a cow?... oh be serious serious?... why?... wait, there is seriousness in this entry, profound, and irreverent, and elusive, and telling, and way too many commas already, aye?) so wait, what happened to the journal? (omigosh, not the journal)... is the journal too personal?... to serious?... am i serious?... too old?... i am laughing, but that doesnt mean i am not serious (someday, somebody will actually understand me then what?) ok, seriously now, why all the public writing?...

well, since i am asking, ill ponder an answer

unless you have one i mean, you are paying attention, arent you?... how many years have you been loyally returning to this very spot to abuse yourself like this?... wait, i mean enlighten yourself like this yeah, thats it how long has it been now and there should be no association with self-abuse and how long it is, at least not in this entry

of course (of course?... like it is so obvious?... who am i patronizing?... or am i condescending myself?... would condescending be the opposite of descending, therefore elevating?... are you following any of these parenthetic asides?) of course what?...

oh, yes, the question and answer of course the answer is simply that i want to believe that someone out there in this universe lives to know everything about me because she (or he, but id personally prefer a she if were talking about mad love and sex, unless its purely platonic, if that is possible, but then, anything is possible, so whomever) is madly in love with me and lives to catch my next breath

yes, thats it, it, i say i want to believe (not unlike muldare, only slightly more romantic ok, maybe much more romantic im not looking for my sister, after all though it sure would be cool if i found her, if she exists, i mean, but thats another tangent for another time and is obviously detracting from the seriousness of the revelation about to be revealed for the billionth time)

what?... yes, it! the reason for life, the universe, and everything (at least mine) and why i write and share so many words i want to believe that someone out there in this universe lives to know everything about me because she is madly in love with me and lives to catch my next breath

reason for being reason for writing reason for three blogs (two blogs and a diary and all the other little writing places) you must had had some clue by now, i mean, this isnt coming as any major shock, is it?...

hey, what do you expect from a hopelessly hopeful romantic? (thats hhr)...

any of you who are understand what i mean, if not exactly, then approximately enough (im not alone, just ask zoe, who is much more amusing and adept at manipulating language in her quest for it shes also much more adorable {and hot as hell, mate}, which may or may not give her an advantage, but we can compare notes some other time for i am about to orate and philosophize about my take on hopelessly hopeful romanticism)

simply (and it is simple):

to share every moment of life and whatever else is beyond life, to live and breath to be with someone because the person completes the perfect sharing youve always dreamed of the symbiotic relationship that life is all about

and i say that anyone who claims they do not want this lives in denial or is so blinded by wounds and scars he/she is afraid to hope for it consciously some just give up hopeful romantics are not hopelessly hopeful romantics, after all

we are of a different core, a core that will give it all every time no matter what happened yesterday we are the ones who are ridiculous fools for love we sing youll never walk alone and the impossible dream (except we know it is possible, we just know it) and need to be in love yes, the (deep breath) carpenters we dont just give peace a chance, we do it we live it and share it and sometimes, we get all emo and italicize and sometimes, get walked all over for the open sharing and giving we do but we will not change for we are what we are

it is not hopeless, nor is it the hopelessly aspect of being hopeful that defines us it means we are going to be hopeful even when hoping seems like the most ridiculously foolish thing that could ever be possibly be done by anyone anywhere at any time all we need is love is a belief system and a way of life nothing can deter us from our faith in being in love

on a physiological level we are addicts, actually addicted to the bio-chemical hormonal rush of giving - trusting - risking loss of everything - even risking death with every breath on every level giving that unconditional trust to someone, the physio-emotional changes in the brain and body when belief is unquestioned and no challenge can sway us

it is the belief in being in love, even beyond the belief in one single individual (important distinction between those hopelessly hopeful romantics who live relatively healthy emotional lives and those who become obsessive compulsive stalkers), but a belief that there is one (at least) individual out there who matches us in every way so the idyllic falling in love can actually happen and a belief that we can find that one

ultimately, it is mostly a choice

yeah, so thats why, for the moment, three daily blogs, or more accurately, two blogs (brief record of daily life and babbling record of daily life and whatever else comes to mind) and a diary (this diary actually, the babbling done to maintain balance, equilibrium, sanity, and to keep the universe from imploding you can thank me later) and a dozen other writing spaces that find something scribbled in them at least once a week and another dozen at least a couple of times a month and still more blogs full of rhymes and rhetoric, emo and cynicism, love and whatever, on occasion, all forming the written gardens that share me in words when nobody is around (so every moment, even alone, the sharing that actualizes the hopelessly hopeful romantic being i am can continue)

makes sense to me

and if it makes sense to you, then yay you hopelessly hopeful romantics unite!... hhr is not something to be shamed or hidden away under the covers we do not need drugs (though they can be fun) i know there are others out there, but exposure is a challenge people mock us use us abuse us but for those who truly think it seems safer in the closet, i says confession is the better part of valor, or something like that

you can dream you can watch it on tv or movies you can have wonderful masturbatory fantasies or (well, actually and/or) you can also risk it all and live the hhr (soon itll be the latest addition to the dsm-v) lifestyle for all youre worth and then, (and only then) have the chance to actually actualize sharing it

all we are saying is give hhr a chance

it is the holiday season, after all






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


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the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

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AND WHATDYA MISS?
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101 Things
The Sequel
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202 Things
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and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
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DO ME WRONG!
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SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
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tell others
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favorites

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HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

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