LIFE

IN
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last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

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ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


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HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
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NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
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HELP AND BE HELPED
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THE FAILURE


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(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2005-04-02 - 3:04 p.m.

all we need is love....


so many people seem to identify themselves with hate, with rallying around an viewpoint that mocks or desparages someone or something... people gather around flags as much to hate others than to lift themselves up to some higher standard or better place... perhaps there can not be light without dark... perhaps there can not be love without hate... perhaps there can not be pleasure without pain... perhaps there can not be heaven without hell, god without devil, and yet...

I want to believe I can identify myself, create myself in my own image... an image I chose based on what i find within myself... an image not defined by others, not defined by comparing myself to others... an image that seeks the best most positive most kind most living most pleasurable most all-encompassing loving perception/perspective on and about everything...

but in doing, in believing this, am I disparaging those who condemn others?... am I placing myself above those who gather to hate or mock?... I hope not, and yet, perhaps...

I think of music, especially popular female singers, and how most of them have sites that are dedicated to bashing them, mocking them, hating them... and I find every one of those singers have songs that inspire me to profound emotion, to tears, to laughter, to feel wonderful, to remember deep trauma, to have fun, and sometimes they melt me...

this thought comes from, or at least starts with the latest batch of library CDs that arrived today... the first song on the first CD (called Women & Songs and bound to be a favorite) I chose from the pile, Christina Aguilera's Beautiful melts me... I love it when someone who is harshly criticized for what they do can respond through what they do in a way that shines the light on the truth in a positive way and that song was a beautiful example of how to respond to hate... to expose the hate for the shallow and meaningless waste of time and energy it is... this is the CD:


Beautiful
Cry
Intuition
I'm Like A Bird
Low
A Woman's Worth
Thank You
Are You Happy Now
Thank U
Adia
How Do I Live
Believe
Lights Out
I Can't Make You Love Me
I'm Ready
Kind & Generousa
Under My Skin
I Wish I Wasn't
Un-Break My Heart


Christina Aguilera
Faith Hill
Jewel
Nelly Furtado
Kelly Clarkson
Alicia Keys
Dido
Michelle Branch
Alanis Morissette
Sarah McLaghlan
LeAnn Rimes
Cher
Lisa Marie Presley
Bonnie Raitt
Cherie
Natalie Merchant
Rachel Yamagata
Heather Headley
Toni Braxton


it is sad that so many people, especially so many teenagers today, devote so much time and energy to hating role models and artists and each other, rather than climb out of the peer pressure stereotyping to find their own identity in the beauty they can create and find in this world... I suppose, just as it must be novel and empowering for a two year old to use the word "NO!" for the first time, it must somehow feel good or at least empowering to express hate or negativity about something or someone or just some sort of "I don't give a fuck" rebel yell...

once there was a generation of people who felt love and YES! was even more satisfying a rebellion than hate and NO!... once there was a way to get back home...

maybe the existential hero has always had some attraction for the human psyche... perhaps it's the instinct to be special, to nurture, to share secrets that has some romantic fantasy percolating in our dreams... some desire to save a soul, to get through the rough exterior, to open a door that has only one key and they key is in you... don't you know your love makes you more special than anything else ever could?... perhaps I ask foolish questions...

but when did it become so cool, so popular, so right to hate?... maybe always... was Jesus hating the moneylenders and merchants?... oh don't go there, surely, for that was another time and place and adds way too much controversy (but it's already done, so this entry is far from where it began in many minds lost along the way, if anyone follows at all)...

returning to music, for that is where most of my mind wants to be right now... while there are few artists who have entire libraries I can claim to love, I rarely find an artist who can be written off in my mind... I love much of the music of Madonna, Britney Spears, Avril Lavigne, Jewel, Alanis Morissette, Natalie Imbruglia, Michelle Branch, Christina Aguilera, and many others who are condemned by many for one aspect or another of their performance, appearance, or music... I love John Denver, The Moody Blues, The Beatles, The Carpenters, Sarah McLaghlan, Barbara Streisand, Barry Manilow, and the BeeGees as much as I love Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, Yes, ELP, Cream, Santana, CSN&Y, The Cure, Metallica, NIN, Linkin Park, or The Who...

it is easier to love music I've lived with longer than music I've known only a few years, for the experiences of a life add to the memories and power of the songs... I love R. Kelly's last CD that returns to the roots of R & B, Josh Groban's return to classic pre-rock pop, and I love classic FM-station 60's rock (and the jams too long for any radio station to play)... I love a lot of 50's and 60's pop rock... I love the tear-jerky 70's and 80's ballads, country and rock and blues... I love 90's grunge... I love the emotion Melissa Etheridge puts into her songs... in recent years I've been getting into the female singers above and Matchbox 20, Alicia Keys, Maroon 5, Pink, Cake, Aayila, Outkast, and this list can easily run into the hundreds of artists...

I chose, in this life, to go with my first love in most all I do... I chose to give my time and energy to people first... and after years of being let down by people, I wonder if I maybe should have chosen to devote my time and energy primarily to my second love, music... would I be happier in a profession that circles around music instead of helping people?... in some ways, yes... and yet, nothing can replace to pure peaceful pleasure I feel when I look into someone's eyes and see a smile of understanding and the hope, even if it's only a shred, that they might believe in the caring I offer and most of all, that the caring is worth something to them, that they might take it and build on it and be a little better off for having shared it...

this is what I find in everything and everyone because this is what I want to find... this is probably why I've stayed away from typical profile lists of likes and dislikes and stats because such categorizings can be so superficial and more negative than ever intended... sure, I do not like lies told to hurt others, I do not like intentional harm, I do not like cruelty and careless waste and most of all I do not like negative energy that has no useful purpose other than to put others down... but why focus on that when there is so much to like, to love all around...

at least this is what I really want to do...

I hope you give yourself the chance to experience the beauty inside of you without the doubts and disclaimers, without the fears and without any need to pose or pretend you are something else... I hope you can enjoy and expose who you are without concern as to whether you are pleasing others... I hope you can look around and find the beauty and wonder and pleasure and positive energy that is out there in this world and all around you... I hope you can trust these words enough to believe that it is there, even if for the moment you do not see it...

you are beautiful, no matter who you are...

and may you know it too...






. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


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the moment

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