LIFE

IN
BLACK
AND
WHITE



last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

o O ( AND COMING SOON! ) O o

ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


blogadvance blogazoo
blogexplosion blogmad?
bloglines


o O ( SOCIAL CONCERNS ) O o

HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
LINKS TO HELP
IMAGES FOR HISTORY
New Orleans News
Buloxi News
THE FAILURE


FREE SPEECH
(tell them what you think)

The White House
(202) 456-1111

Senate and Congress
(202) 224-3121

YOU'VE GOT THE RIGHTS
USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
BLOGATHON!
INDEX BEGIN
FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2006-09-09 - 12:39 a.m.

Act II


thank you, please hold the applause until the performance is concluded (burp)... or don't because then the last entry in the series gets all the comments and the component entries feel like nobody cares about them (entries have feelings, you know?), giving them an inferiority complex and gas, for which there is no cure... and nobody should ever suffer the malady of gas for which there is no cure...

not even in a Monty Python sketch...

recently, in reading diaries here again, quite at random, mind you, because I have not had time to actually catch up on the people I want to catch up on like Tim or Nicole or Z0tl or so many others...

and when it comes down to looking in someone's eyes and speaking the truth, this online world is the epitome of illusion (and for those who don't believe life is illusion, this online world is as real as the walls they live inside and the routine they call their lives, nowhere, man... but isn't that a bit like you and me)...

and how many make a fantasy so real it becomes a phenomenon that requires investigation as if it really mattered... but it's all relative in the end, we make matter what we want to make matter, even if it's an illusion...

I believe LO might not know PF, the latter being from middle Europe, or perhaps Germany (but I was hoping for a trip to Amster, dam, to go out for a relaxing smoke), and the former being allegedly from San Mateo, but San Diego could be just as close to Singapore for the moon to fit through the eye of a needle in an alternative universe...

still, if I could be down under I would be a happy camper letting her ride (or any of the f a n t a s i e s that may all, in the end, lead nowhere, man (deja vu)...

and spending much childhood years growing up listening to NYC radio (WNEW-FM, once the greatest radio station in the universe) I recall the fun and hassle of celebrity that lead to the fun of secret identities that may seem, to those out of the loop, to be some sort of betrayal and yet, if there was no real trust to begin with, what can be betrayed?...

all of life is a stage and we are but players, albeit most choose to play the part of audience or critic, the internet is a playground for the imagination primarily due to it's inherent anonymity and mystery... you choose whether you find a a plethora of paranoia or a playground of pleasure, but none of this has anything to do with him or the members of the band, really...

people seem to like to think they are in control (though of what exactly, I may never know) and it would seem, looking at human behavior, that there are many challenged by the word, truth is love and that seems to scare most people of intellect because there's no rationale behind the hormonal imbalance caused by the emotional flood that is love...

and being out of control scares people, but even more, those who've let go and been left wanting, left behind, left beaten, left alone, left for dead after giving their all to love leaves many in what the quasi-science of psychology calls post traumatic shock disorder (or perhaps even toxic shock syndrome of a sort as the same hormones that brought the sweetest euphoria and wanting to live forever now bring the feeling of being poisoned and wanting to die)...

there are drugs that can attempt to set the hormonal and cranial chemical imbalances right, but all that is still mostly theoretical and highly experimental at this point (frighteningly so, if you know how many children are being used as guinea pigs in the quest for the perfect soma)...

but I believe (whatever belief may be, the most powerful force or illusion of all, perhaps) the only way to cure what ails the broken heart is to forgive one's self for all that went wrong and learn to live with it and dare to love again (even though the first cut may actually be the deepest, purest, and best/worst cut of all)...

the challenge is that the loving again part requires the cooperation of someone else, so there's no controlling the healing process and there's great risk that the very process itself will tear away yet another little piece of your heart out, baby (and we know how Janis handled that, but suicide may be painless and it may bring on many changes, but it may bring on nothing and while nothing may seem to be exactly what the doctor ordered, it's not really what you want because if it was, you'd not be hurting)...

but here on the net the illusion of life and emotion is in our face all the time if we don't put a paper bag over our heads and blinders on... looking back on all the browsing browsing browsing I've done and how I tried to pass along some wonderful life and emotions (via links) along the way, only to find the art and wisdom and creativity and wonder and fun is gone as if it never was and all we find are error pages, 404s, broken links, locked sites, and a disappointing waste of time, highlights the transiency of the illusion that real people are on the other end of the computer screen...

we can only hope that the others we link to over the years maintain their illusion as long as we do, but sadly, most do not... and it turns all the browsing and linking and enthusiasm for finding and sharing online into a waste of time, depressing when viewed this way, so I don't as much as possible (because I prefer happier illusions even as the world of humanity seems to thrive on watching tragedy over and over and even staying in a constant state of rage over it {rap, anyone?} and sometimes I've just got to give it back in the language of the troll because I will not be another brick in the wall so there)...

CONTINUE







. o O ( NOTES ARE THE NEW HAPPY PILL ) O o .
(just let me know you were here)




see me - - - feel me - - - touch me - - - heal me


< last one < < < < BURP! > > > >next one >




.

.

.

.

.

the moment

we interrupt these seemingly mindless dots for a word from (or at least about our sponsor (hmmm, sponsor?... what's the opposite of sponsor?)... anyway, now, as ado-less as possible, the word for you or andrew)...

you know that box to the right on the dland entry page called recent public entries?... what do the asterisks mean?... and the bold?...

. . .

connections

.

.

.

.

AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
babbling through computer concerns
stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
(read archived notes)

send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


BACK TO #1 @ GOOGLE!

WAS #1 @ MSN!
(for a while, now on page 3 5)




(EXPERIMENTAL PLAYTHINGS)
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brilliant idea
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FOR FREEDOM



CONTINUE...
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