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last---past---next---now
( FEATURED OTHERS 'n STUFF )

MEG AND DIA!

ORLANDO?

WHERE IT BEGAN


ARE THEY SERIOUS?
(how far are we from censorship?)

ONE. . . WHY
(find your social conscience)

Barbara Waters: so candoor, what all this fuss about blogmad?

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o O ( ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ) O o

CONVERSATION WITH GOD

MEANING OF LIFE
FORWARD THIS ENTRY
INTELLIGENT DESIGN

(SEE WHAT THE POPE SAYS)

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ABOUT ZOOPLA

o O ( AND CURRENT EVENTS ) O o


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HELP THE RED CROSS
MESSAGES FROM MISSISSIPPI
BLOG FOR RELIEF
NEW ORLEANS JOURNAL

(MIRROR OF N.O. JOURNAL)
(INCLUDING LIVE CAM AND PHOTOS)

HELP AND BE HELPED
HURRICANE HOUSING
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THE FAILURE


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(202) 456-1111

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(202) 224-3121

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USE THEM





FAT MAN WALKING
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FACE FUN!



last---past---next---now



SITES I SEE A LOT
IxQuick Search
Google Search
itools references
movie database

Giga-Quotes

Harry Chapin Lyrics
SSA




OLD AND NEW READS
(WISH I HAD MORE TIME
TO READ and EXPLORE)

mother jones
utne reader
common dreams
the progressive
mediate
the other side
orion
harper's
rolling stone
reel classics


fallout shelter
the memory hole
song meanings
truth out
wil wheaton
bugmenot
global news matrix
break for news
are you generic?
neil gaiman
h2g2
daily kos
the truth laid bear
reason
capitol hill blue
boing boing
nobody here




SITES I AM CONSIDERING
SEEING MORE OFTEN

3Hive
metafilter
comics
digg





REFERENCE LIBRARIES

questia
wikipedia
gutenberg
internet public library

itools references
movie database
Giga-Quotes
rare-lyrics
all musicals




AMUSEMENTS

Diaryland Times
home star runner
hell
hell too
sinfest
ill will press
the guide
purple
despair
maximum awesome
86 the onions
straight dope
something awful
glossy news
eric conveys emotion
odd todd
cracked



CULTURE

the superficial
darwin awards
this is true
urban legends
news of the weird
church of the fsm
the onion
god checker
faqs
fark
iGod
post secret
webby awards
meetup
the white house
ragged trousered philosopher
the smoking gun
the defective yeti
landover baptist
evil bible


COMMERCIAL CRAP (AND PRON)

(Note: pron is porn worth a look for amusement much more than passion, so if you see a (p) next to a link, be aware naked people may appear if you click it, m'ok?)

beautiful agony (p)
(a turn on or a laugh?)
real doll (p)
(the ultimate self-indulgence)

(or it could just be a typo)




PROMPTS
(IF YOU KNOW ONE LET ME KNOW)


Unconscious Mutterings
Friday Feast
Wednesday Whatevers
Sunday Brunch
Monday Madness
Thursday Threesom
Saturday Questions




(make it real)

PO BOX 780398
Orlando, FL 32878

send me some music
your favorite music
old or new
blissful or blue
let your message come through
and I will love you forever



last---past---next---now
�2006 Candor Communications


2007-02-03 - 4:56 a.m.

three from RealTime


1. yes, once again I am piling up words in other places and communications with strangers and bit and pieces are finding their way into the babble files so the empty spaces behind the candoor will likely be filled suddenly, like, say, with about two weeks worth of entries next weekend (perhaps you've noticed)...

maybe even another imaginary falling in love fantasy (who says it's imaginary?... secretly, we may never know... it's just too much fun playing in the vast unknown... imagine the kid finally finding out there's some all-everything god and all the unknown is gone... so the kid looks at the god and says, so whatcha wanna play now?... you know, testing senses of humor forever and ever and ever cuz, after all, we've got to make sure those senses of humor are in tip top shape what with the challenges and drama people seem to enjoy creating for themselves)...

good day at work, found myself nodding off when I got home as I only gave the body about 3 hours sleep last night... stuffed pizza into my face and woke just in time to find Jack Bauer deciding to save the world on television again... somewhere in the very near future I shall find the bed, the little broken bed, and pass out until morning...

but my mind wants to party all the time party all the time party all the time... and so it does... even when the body appears unconscious... speaking of the body, the hamstrings are tight, but coming back... I mean, who would be wild and crazy enough to actually pull a hamstring at a concert, anyway, right?...

and that's today... I'd probably have more exciting blog news if I was touring with a band or just traveling around as I did for a while in the nineties, but then, life is what it is these days and it's rarely any less fun for me on the inside (though it increases exponentially when shared with the right people and soars past all limits when the right person partners)...

hopefully you'll find your way to your own pleasure centers in your mind and turn yourself on to the life party that's going on all the time and join on in, whether as a zombie or ghost or meditating fool or a clown or a jester or just playing it cool, sooner or later, if you jump in the pool, you may find getting wet is not so bad... and in your mind you can remain living through the best times you ever had (until the opportunity to share even better times comes along)... you know what?... loving you is easy cuz you're beautiful... feel it, cuz it's true... and on that note I say g'nite to you...

nite nite J



2. yup, I actually found myself requiring some R & R today.. luckily, there was football on TV so I had the perfect excuse to lay around browsing the web and glancing up when the announcers started choking on their words...

my hamstring and calf are still sore... yes, that was one heckova cramp, strained the muscles for sure, but I don't think they are pulled...

not much babbling this weekend... maybe I'm just waiting for the fans at myspace (I've got more than 1600 now and they keep coming... it's like somebody put out a sign pointing them to my myspace... weird and egocentric and amusing all at once) and diaryland to scream and beg for more... they just don't throw underwear up on the stage like they used to, ya know?...

ah, but this every day blog remains the secret all those superficial fans don't take the time to know about... it's our little secret... isn't that special?... I'm almost excited to think somebody might stumble on in here at any moment and add his or herself to our little party... I promise he or she will only be a favorite for a few moments... you know how fickle I am... and you'll be sure to tell him or her, please, so they don't run away, right?... heck, we might even have some silent readers lurking about giggling at me right now... don't get all paranoid now (or as Kevin would say, don't be scared now... you know the movie, don't you?...

I love you, even when I am in these odd sort of irreverent moods... and I shall keep this daily report of life offline in, you know, RealTime, going as long as I humanly can... even after my ever expanding messages in bottles in search of the one finally brings the one to my side...

that reminds me that I once titled one of my journals In Search Of Eros... one of hundreds boxed and stored about forty miles north of Niagara Falls (slowly I turn)... I wonder if I'll ever unpack, reminisce, and share all that stuff again...

in RealTime, I mean...

so TV and food (of course, gotta eat... especially when lounging around... I am trying to be American, after all)... and web browsing and messaging at myspace... no drama today, just smiley happy people... and not just the REM kind... or was that Supertramp?... naaa, REM... sheesh, my musical memory is slipping... quick, before I forget, I know it sounds absurd, please tell me who I am... must have been that stroke I suffered at the concert last night...

hopefully you are laughing with me, or perhaps I really am losing my mind... then I'd have two essential things to be searching for... I'd probably still go chasing after the one first... perhaps that's proof I already lost it (my mind) a long time ago...

and so in conclusion, ask not what your blog can do for you, as what you can do for your blog... yeah, this is what happens sometimes when there's not a lot going on and I haven't babbled anywhere else...

you love me, even when I am in these odd sort of irreverent moods, right?... I'm gonna go now, cuz it would be reasonably sensible to start the week off with ay least five hours sleep... yes, the ate stamp is stuck on when I opened this blog window... that was three hours ago... I've been wandering around the web... I am a wanderer, after all... that is one of my web names, though it's used mostly in the fantasy sports arena... that reminds me, I haven't checked my fantasy sports teams since last year... Rasputin hasn't reminded me this season... probably because I won a football league last year without looking at the team for the last six or eight weeks of the season... he takes it more seriously than I do... I thought I was going now?...

if I keep this up I'll have an entry for behind the candoor (oh really?)... there, I just had to get the plug in, right?... I mean, just in case somebody stumbles by here and this daily life RealTime stuff is boring or too brief...

ok, enough irreverence, back to R & R... hope you had as much fun as I did today, or more, even... just remember I love you and it'll be alright... or at least it'll be an old song... stop me before I get started on music...

nite nite J



3. meanwhile, in other myspace news (as that is where I am finding most of my amusements and inspirations these days), the potential is mostly unfulfilled and that just leaves me longing more than ever for the bottom line womb-like inspirations in the real world RealTime inspiration (which has been sorely lacking for years now)... so the ache for sharing life offline on more than superficial levels is greater than usual these days and I'm full of sighs and aliases, but as the title says, otherwise fine...

giggling and grinning at that, since the ache is a wonderful expression of life for me... even though I've rather the ache be relieved and the hunger the share be satiated (as if the insatiable can be satiated, but I know what I mean), it's oddly wonderful to feel starvation again...

this may be why I am writing with a certain tone, more caustic or biting or confrontative or pushing the limits or something like that... I mean in the writing I do everywhere but here... here, where I attempt to just sum up the facts, I tend to write with as much objectivity as I can muster as I am just reporting life as I recall it and not getting as babbly or creative as in my other writings... but elsewhere, well, I haven't written a sappy love song in a week or more...

obviously, based on the linkage, I am feeling desperate to be discovered in my most vulnerable moments by someone who could inspire me to fall in love again... that is such a wonderful desperation, if you understand the instinct and positivity and depths behind and within it... unfortunately, from my experiences with others, I've found most people choose the negative view of such hunger and find misery and agony and want to share a pity party with all the trimmings... and I wonder why people are so negative... afraid to feel, perhaps... alas and all...

anyway, much accomplished at work, then home to write an epic rhyme that will find it's way out on the net somewhere (epic, aye?... how's that for a build-up?)... you know, the kind of epic poem (though not as long as ancient epics, though it might be grown in time) that could be a harmless drivel or a profound reflection and/or challenge to an individual or everyone or an institution like government or religion or capitalism or any ism or maybe even the universe... I wonder what the great critics and literary analysts would make of it....

hey, what else have I got to do when I am all alone and longing like this other than amuse myself with self-important perspectives and illusions that I am some historic artifact for some future culture to treasure and/or worship, aye?...

of course this is exactly what I am not supposed to do here, babble, but then, breaking the rules is what I do everywhere... Jake 2.0 and Stargate SG1 played in the background for hours (like eight) as I browsed the web (slowly), responded to messages, babbled, rhymes, cooked and ate pizza, did several loads of laundry, and drank a ton of Code Red... so of course I have to find some drama somewhere, right?... at least my drama doesn't involved sending negative notes to people, right?... or as Don McLean sang, everybody loves me baby...what's the matter with you?... won't you tell me what did I do, to offend you?...

I suppose I should not be so amused by the real internal emotional conflicts and negativity and drama people create based on words from relative strangers on the net, but hey, we create the fine illusions of unconditional love and beauty and trust, after all... I think it's time to turn the TV off and put on some music... I haven't listened to Meg and Dia in a week or more, after all (for shame)... oh, how I long for the fall at this moment... and the giggles... yes, the giggling true love fall, that's where I want to be...

yeah, life is just too exciting these days J






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the moment

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AND WHATDYA MISS?
Laughing Lament
stranger brews
once upon a diaryland
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stunningly missing
older still


random chance

who me?

leave a note?
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send me mail?

you want to know me?
soundtrack
101 Things
The Sequel
The Trilogy
202 Things
200 Things
202 More Things
202 Things Again
testing123
have time, love words?
sleepwriting
(where the heart dreams)

and now, in RealTime�

DO ME!
(Johari Style)


DO ME WRONG!
(but do me right)


SOAP!

(EPISODE ONE)
(the dark side of candoor)


loving linkers
other loves

A Diaryland Survey
other surveys
small world
your profile matters
(search for you & find me)


tell others
read others
applause?
favor?
gift?

get your own!

saturn rings and other places
googlisms
browsing
where've ya been?
the searchers

favorites

911
HEY AMERICA!
LOOK AT YOUR CHILD
STOP THE ABUSE

(GET THE CODE)

THOUGHTS ON GOD

( temporary attractions )


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